signora oye vey to hell with perfect
Kroner are tight these days, so I couldn’t justify going out for pizza for the sake of a dare. Instead I made pizza at home. The only person available in front of whom to eat the finished pizza was Pancake, and he’s not one to wait to be invited to sample whatever smells good in the kitchen.
The following scene exists in my memory in slow-motion, as many intense, you-have-to-act-fast experiences are wont to do.
I pulled the steaming pizza from the oven and watched as Pancake’s head snapped around, beckoned by the sound of the pan’s clattering and the rich tomato smell. I hardly felt the burn to my fingers as I ripped off a bit of pizza; he was already on his feet so there was no time for a knife or pizza cutter. I shoved the hot pizza in my mouth as he lunged toward me and I attempted to speak coherently despite the burning mouthful: “Ha, ha – I’m eating pizza and you’re not!” (Luckily it was a vegan pizza so no cheese fused with my upper pallet upon this maneuver.) He followed my example of unceremoniously standing at the oven and snarfing down steaming pizza from the pan, so with that I ceased eating pizza in front of someone else and began eating pizza with someone. (8 – check)
I still haven’t dared to:
02. Say “Only 1 person has died in this elevator”.
04. Punch a policeman. (not gonna happen)
05. Buy a lottery ticket.
07. Ask someone if they are a model.
09. Read poetry aloud in public.
10. Draw a chalk flower in a cemetery.
14. Ask a stranger with a tattoo if he likes ballet.
17. Wear 2 watches and ask someone for the time.
19. Eat a spoonful of instant coffee.
20. Read Gone With the Wind. (in progress – Ch. 24)
22. Order a Big Mac at any restaurant other than McDonald’s.
24. Eat a dessert made with mustard.
25. Ride a roller coaster.
26. Dance in public.
27. Dye my hair.
31. Hula hoop.
32. Hold an ice cube until it melts without adding salt.
40. Leave a note in a library book.