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Kairiel T-T

Beat my depression (read all 9 entries…)
no improvement since last entry

except SOMETIMES i can write massive amounts of insults on my body with pen instead of cutting.
Otherwise i’d say i got worse, i spend most of the time either being DESOLATE, or being guilty and looking up triggering stuff because sadness is NICER.
wheres my backbone gone!?
how do you kickstart happiness when you just dont WANT too?! (the usual i dont deserve happiness, etc etc)



Comments:

Meditation

while not a magic bullet that will kill your depression, has done wonders for my mental wellbeing. I’m far from being where I want to be but I find that the more I meditate, the better I get at intercepting negative thoughts that creep from the dark edges of my mind. I became more aware of thoughts and feelings and saw them as separate from who I truly am. I suggest you get ‘Power of Now’ by Eckhart Tolle.

Quick summary of his ideas:
-You are not your thoughts and feelings
-your depression arises from focusing on the dark shit that happened in your past
-Anxiety comes from your fear of the future
-In both cases you’re unhappiness stems from not being aware in the present moment, always thinking of what went wrong in your life or youre busy living in a hypothetical future.

Kairiel T-T

im going to try that.
I dont have any experience with mindfulness meditation, i havent done any since i attempted the year and a day wicca trial… This could be fun.


 

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