Spark In The Dark for a minute there, I lost myself.
So this “beating depression” thing isn’t coming together as I’d hoped. I haven’t pulled up stakes here or abandoned my goals, I just withdraw for awhile and mope and cry and think and then come back.
Who IS this other person? There are two of us: the one who wholeheartedly believes everything is okay (or if it isn’t, it will be), and the other who believes all the things I so desperately desire will always be out of my reach.
I don’t need to be ridiculously happy all the time. I know that no one is. But I’ve been blindsided so many times with these feelings of hopelessness that I don’t know what to do but submit. It’s that terrifying moment when the wind has just been knocked out of you and you’re not sure if you’ll be able to catch your breath again.