If you’re like me, and go into overdrive whenever something negative happens – you’ll most likely understand how difficult it is to ‘draw a line in the sand’ and get on with the rest of your life. The mind gets used to a certain way of thinking, and eventually when you’ve driven yourself into a pit deeper than your own grave, you finally realise something needs to give; although, you don’t have any idea of how to even begin to change. You might be able to identify the trigger that caused it, for example: a friend cancelling on you may result in you cultivating the thoughts “I’m always let down” or “I don’t have any real friends”. But again, it’s difficult to de-personalise the situation unless you physically take yourself out of it, and start to see life’s situations from an extremely objective point of view.

My childhood was a bit wank. Isn’t everybody’s? I haven’t lived in one place for more than six years, and as a result of moving, never kept any friends. It was a blur of moving house, my own company and the occasional nasty remark. High school was unbearable, and college was propelled with the notion that I’d be leaving the area in two years or so. Finally ridding myself of the negativity in the area where I spent my teenage years, I’m here, at University still tormented by shit that happened to me in the past.

I wouldn’t wish that upon anybody because I know how scarring it can be.

Anyway, I’ve learnt that to overcome those sorts of triggers, you need to re-tune your mind, teach it to override the instantaneous negative thoughts and begin to think more objectively – ultimately, more positively.

Sounds easy, doesn’t it? Bugger me, it’s not. I’ve started ‘getting over’ things by simply packing my day out with stuff I enjoy. It takes the extra effort of making my bed in the morning, cooking tea from scratch, and most recently pulling my bike out from behind the sofa and down a narrow staircase, just to cycle into the city for an hours trip. I’ve stopped doing my errands for convenience, and started doing them properly for my own pleasure. When I’m doing stuff I enjoy, or rather, being productive, I’m subconsciously getting over reservations or pre-conceptions of situations I once had. Because I’m doing it for me.

It shows that when you’re generally a more optimistic and positive person, people will probably want to spend more time with you. Not that they wouldn’t when you’re down, you’re just more enjoyable to be around when you’re in a good mood. I don’t blame them. Negativity saps your energy and hinders your productivity.

So I guess where I’m going with this is to overcome triggers by being proactive about them. And hopefully the rest will follow suit.

Have you any experiences or good advice? Drop a line.