Today marks a month, give or take since I don’t like to count days, since I’ve picked. I still had some times when I would catch myself touching the side of my face at my desk and there were a couple pimples I focused too much on but… I haven’t had those horrible sessions that last for hours or cause so much damage that you feel like sh*t right after/the next day.
I believe some personal problems I have been dealing with steered me away from picking because I didn’t want to add to how bad I felt. Some things were not all in my control so I focused on how this IS. Certainly not an ideal motivator, but that’s that.
Also, a big, positive factor might be that I started running again. I like to run and missed it and I also want to lose weight. Since I work long hours, I just get up, go to work, and right after I’m off I go home and change into my running clothes/shoes. No questions, no dwelling on how I should be cleaning or on some errand and especially no dwelling on the mirror. By the time I finish running, it’s late, I’m exhausted, I shower and then sleep! Plus, I’m thinking of joining a gym and I can’t cover my face there, the sweat and make-up would be gross, so that’s been another motivator. Since I want to lose some weight, I don’t want to contribute to my skin being splotchy and feeling embarrassed while makeup-less at the gym.
I still have impurities in my skin, but it’s getting clearer in terms of the marks I have caused myself. It’s somewhat tempting to pick the impurities, but they’re so much easier to cover-up than scabs or hyperpigmentation. I’ve also read SO much about how many, many other people have impurities too… perfect skin is a myth. Check this out
that plus magazine articles. It’s like we all have gunk in our face at some point, but the difference is not everyone obsesses and hurts their skin like we do/have.
Yes, I hate that my skin won’t cooperate with me in that regard, but overall, I hurt less just not.picking.any.more!
This wasn’t over-night and who knows how long I’ll continue to ignore ‘mirror time’, but it’s been a process that I got more serious about when I saw those videos of people that managed to stop! The idea that it can be done… I can only hope I continue to function this way because I know it’s hard to stop once we get started.