Occasionally, after a stressful day, I “relapse” and pick at one spot. That is always embarrassing. I have to hide it behind makeup and I feel compelled to make up a stupid lie of a back-story. My next goal is to stop myself when I’m at the mirror. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve picked, but that’s how it goes—I’m going to make a note and put it on my mirror, something that will remind me (and not the maintenance man) of how much more embarrassing a giant wound is than a pimple.
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I had been doing such a good job, was even okay not wearing make up to run errands, now I have a huge wound on the bottom of my right cheek and would prefer the small pimple I had over THIS. Ive been so depressed about it, I havent gone out in two days.
notredamegirl, I once picked at a cyst on my forehead that scabbed so badly that I told my boyfriend (at the time) and friends that I burnt myself with a curling iron. I know how stupid it feels to lie about picking, but trying to explain it to someone is harder than making up a ridiculous lie. Also, I used to pin inspirational quotes and photos on or near the mirror in the bathroom to help soothe me when I felt the urge to pick. I did that when I lived alone and it helped immensely. I also put a calendar by the bathroom mirror and drew a happy face on every day that I didn’t pick. Sounds silly, but I looked forward to drawing that happy face before bed. On the days I did pick, I just left it blank (no need to make myself feel worse about something I already felt horrible about). So anyway, it did help me so much. I kept that up until I moved out. Having roommates now makes it more difficult to do that. Though on the other hand, having someone around also keeps me distracted and deters me from picking because I don’t want them to ask me what’s wrong. I wish it could keep me from doing it altogether, but sadly, I sometimes find myself waiting for everyone to go to bed so I can pick.
EXPfedup, I know what you mean by preferring the pimple you had before you picked at it. I often experience that same regret after I’ve picked at something that I could have just left alone and let run its course. I think, though, that it’s important to point out that if we feel that way after we pick, it could work to remind ourselves of that same thing before we pick. And maybe not by saying to ourselves, “You’re going to regret it if you do this…” because that could put negative us. Rather, I think we could tell ourselves, “It’s going to be a lot better if I just let it be… plus, if I don’t pick at this one, I won’t be urged to pick at other blemishes that are hardly there (or don’t even exist at all), and my skin will be so much better for it.” Besides, if we want to cover up a blemish, putting a dab of concealer over a pimple is a lot easier (and I know how hard this can be too. You just want it gone…. out of your skin. It might even be painful to keep it there. But we know that if it’s not ready to go, it could get a lot worse if we pick at it. And can we really just pick at one blemish and leave the rest of our face alone? For me, that’s a very rare occasion.) But it is a lot easier than trying to make a scab not look like a scab. And I’m sure for those of us who have ever worn makeup to hide the damage, we know what it looks like on top of a scab. Ick… :o)
I know that it is difficult, but we’ll keep out chins up and power through it one day at a time.