Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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AOK

let go (read all 2 entries…)
#2. Giving Unsolicited Advice

Last week someone I trust told me that the reason people come to vent and process their thoughts and feelings with me is because they trust me and that they want my advice. The blind spot they pointed out to me was that I am too quick to give advice. At times this overwhelms or makes people feel as if I am acting in an arrogant way. When I replied that most of the time people do actually ask me for my opinion, he challenged me to listen more closely to their need(s). This includes not only their words, but their intent. In reflecting on this I realize that while they may eventually want my ideas and input, I am way too pushy and need to back off and be more patient. This is hard for me. Really hard. This person suggested that When someone comes to me, I listen generously the first round of conversation and then give it some time. Let the person share and then process. At a later time I can approach the person and revisit the topic. I can then ask if they are looking for ideas. After learning this a few days ago I realized this is extremely important work for me to do.

Then today I once again spoke too soon. It happened yesterday as well. I feel like I am making a bit of progress, but it is one step at a time. I am gaining awareness but am not yet able to exercise the self-control. That is hard. Really hard. But it is important for me to learn. Really important.



Comments:

I really liked your post. It reminded me that sometimes what people say is only a clue to what they actually mean.

Sometimes I think it’s best to ask, “where are this person’s feelings coming from? Why are they saying what they’re saying?” because overly-simplistic, off-the-wall complaints/statements always seem to have a deeper root.

I’m not sure if I wrote this more in response to you or just simply in reflection… hmm

:)


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