I have discovered that the only real way I can have balance in my emotions right now is to get used to the idea of not being with Megan. If I can do this then I might be able to salvage what scraps of sanity I have left. The way I figure it is that if I am used to not being with her and it turns out we try again to be together…It will be a bonus I didn’t expect. It isn’t easy to get over 3 years worth of close companionship through some of the roughest things we have ever been through but that’s my goal.