I know there’s some sort of deep rooted psychological need that wasn’t met as a child that causes me to so dseperately want the approval of my husband. But why can’t he just give me what i need? It seems the more I do to try to get a good word out of him, the more he finds wrong with what I’m doing. If I have dinner ready for him when he gets home, he’s mad because I wasted time cooking instead of cleaning. If I have the house spotless, he’s mad because I don’t keep the house clean all the time. If I ask him to go out on a date, he’s mad because I always want to spend money and stay away from home. If I want to stay home, he’s mad because I never want to go out with him. And it goes on and on. It isn’t all in my mind, which is what he tries to tell me. Other people close to us have noticed him doing it too. But if anyone else says anything to him, he blows up and says everyone is ganging up on him and no one cares about him anymore and he can’t do anything right. I know I can’t be the only person going through this, but it feels like it.
Comments:
you are
not the only who feels like this.. my mother is currently going through the same thing. just dont let yourself down
WOW!!!
I can’t tell you how much this sounds like my life. Perfect example, I was late getting out of the office yesterday. I decided to go to the grocery store after and pick up a few groceries. I had a long day and I was taking my time, he told me that he was tired too and was going to go to bed. So I didn’t hurry. Well, as I was leaving the grocery store I phoned to let him know I was on the way and you would have thought I had cheated on him or something. The week before he complained that I didn’t call at all and he it made him worry. So I called, it still wasn’t good enough. Nothing that I do is anymore. I do something one way and it’s wrong, I do it his way the next time and it’s still wrong. I have this NEED to please him and it feels like he knows that and uses it against me. I know he loves me but I used to think that everything was my fault, that I didn’t do anything right. But I know that it isn’t all my fault, he has some issues of his own, it’s called being a CONTROL FREAK! If he isn’t controlling it then it’s wrong. But I do still find myself trying to please him, it just never seems to work. So don’t beat up on yourself, you’re not alone, AT ALL!!!
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exzess cheered this 3 years ago
