Achievement: Living on my own

Admittedly, this happened by necessity rather than by choice… so as a result, I didn’t enter into this new living arrangement in an incredibly positive frame of mind.

I’d never lived on my own before. At the age of 19, I moved from the family home (in Darwin) to Melbourne with my first boyfriend (whom I’d started seeing at the age of 16). We then lived together for 3 1/2 years. When I left that relationship, I lived with a friend for a short while, but basically ended up moving straight in with the man who’s about to become my ex-husband. We were together for just over 7 years, until I moved out in September 2005.

Everything about this move was confronting for me. Apart from being on my own, at a time when I felt completely shattered… I was moving into an area with which I was not hugely familiar. I was also moving from a lovely house that was mine… that we’d built… into a rented flat. Small and depressing in comparison.

Slowly, however, I began to adjust to my new abode. I started to enjoy the feeling of freedom… making my own decisions, taking full responsibility for everyday jobs and chores (okay, so I still suck at housework, but it gets done eventually). I even deal with spiders as required… there might be lots of squealing, but that squealing now accompanies action rather than running away and calling for help.

It’s taken a lot of time and adjusting… and I do still have boxes that I haven’t yet dealt with… but I’m now quite comfortable living on my own. I no longer equate it with ‘being alone’... and I even call this place home.