How to survive the so-called "rapture" predicted for may 21, 2011... who's with me?!? by smartstuff

"Oh-oh-oh-ohoo I'm in love with Judas, Judas"

How I did it: I put Lady Gaga's single "Judas" on repeat and sang along. Really, if you don't want to be saved, singing along to Lady Gaga aught to do the trick every time. If you're feeling really nervous, though, you can increase your chances of being passed over by smudging your house with sage (you know how Jesus feels about sage) and saying a prayer to Ganesha, or posting on the internet about supporting gay rights. From all I have gathered from those who were planning to be raptured today, pop music, polytheism, and social liberalism are some of the best ways to be guaranteed a spot on earth during the final days. Especially that gay rights thing. Saves otherwise "rapture worthy" people every time!

Resources: Metrolyrics for the lyrics. Lady Gaga for saving me from being taken before I've had a full life. I'll stay here for a while longer, thanks!


1 person found this helpful
 

May 21, 2011, 06:52PM PDT | 4 comments | 30 cheers


Comments:

tangerine_now has no more cheers to give out today.

Ah.

So that’s what did it. Damn you Remco, Sven, Hilde etc. for being nice people! Why didn’t you just let me judge and condemn you in peace? But noooo, you had to be all “hi I’m [insert name here] how are you” at me instead of “hi I’m gay and corrupting your children so shun me” like you’re supposed to be doing, freaks of nature that you are supposed to be! Sheesh, some people have no sense of decorum.

May 22, 2011, 11:21AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 2 cheers

smartstuff

I'm sorry you weren't taken

But I’m glad you’re still here.

Lets have a sinners party!

May 22, 2011, 11:26AM PDT | Respond to this 3 cheers

WyvernDust

for me

it was just dance

Jun 04, 2011, 08:12AM PDT | Respond to this

joie de vivre is celebrating 6 years on this site

my rapture experience

just odd it was

Oct 26, 08:29AM PDT | Respond to this 3 cheers


smartstuff has gotten 30 cheers on this entry.

 

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