How I did it: My family has been out of the country for 6 months, while I stayed behind for school and work. You have no idea how lonely i feel sometimes. It doesn't help that I have depression. This Thanksgiving, my mom's best friend picked me up for the holiday. She has become a de facto aunt. Anyway, she has a granddaughter named Sherley. She is 12 years old, in 7th grade, 5'6'' and a riot. Like any other kid, she doesn't have a problem hanging in the computer all day. But that's because her helicopter grandma won't let her visit friends because she doesn't know the family.As a result, Sherley is beginning to show early signs of depression and a very sad outlook on life. Like I did at her age and just now, at 20, beginning to recover from. The girl is walking on eggshells; She is told to do chores and other things and she of course does them. However, if she doesn't do them "perfectly", she gets scolded. So she gave up on trying to please her grandma and let her do things herself. In school, she used to be an honor student but gave up because her family doesn't even acknowledge it. When she shows her grandma her accomplishments, and I've seen it first hand, her grandma tells her "So what"? All she does and is allowed to do is go home, sit on the bed, and eat. Frequently, even when she is not hungry. And she is wondering why the girl is getting big.

Basically, she is in the same shoes I was at her age and I do not want her to end up like me, feeling like you're useless for some of the best years of her life. I've become sort of her sister. We talk, we play, I go with her to her friends' homes, even if it can be annoying to be surrounded by 12 year old kids. I've taught her the importance of reading and finding a creative outlet, her favorite is drawing. How to express herself through song and poetry. Helped her with her schoolwork, helped give her a mini makeover. Established a workout routine she can do in her room. Taught her how to save time in the morning, and overall, gave her some advice I knew she'd need and more. Told her not to be ashamed of her height (she towers most of the boys in class) nor be afraid to show her intelligence. Taught her some finance and math. Even though I barely have any time to eat with the hours, I told her that she can contact me anytime, about anything. We keep regular correspondence through emails and call her everyday, even if for a few minutes. I know it might seem obvious to do what I did for her, but so many kids don't have a "mentor" and are in dire need of one. Dire because this is an impressionable age, whatever happens at this stage will motivate them from then on. It is important that they feel valuable. I feel proud and happy. I may not be able to help and give love to every kid out there, but I can do that with one. Sherley has made me feel needed and loved, always listening and asking with open curiosity. I take her to work with me at school and have her help me out. She is learning to hone her organizational and math skills through my bookkeeping job. My coworkers love her. And I give her a small percentage of what I make a month, usually $20-$30 for her to save. She now has a small checking account under my name with all of the money she gets as gifts and such. She only spends very little and it goes towards field trips and books. This is how my little brother made me feel before he moved out, and now I have the little sister I've always wanted. I have company and have an outlet with which to share my experiences with. Worth every minute and penny.

Lessons & tips: I think it is our responsibility to inspire and help those who need it, regardless of age. Years ago there seemed to be an importance in mentoring the "young" and inexperienced. Yes, most kids receive an education today, at least in this country, but they need outlets to use what they learned in the world outside of school. Many kids aren't allowed to do that in our panic struck life. They need to, and a job and after school activities is not the only way to do that.

Don't be afraid to be surrounded by kids, or people like the person you're helping anyway. The only reason why i found it annoying at first was because of how crazy young girls can be. I remember the first time I "chaperoned" them, the whole "Justin Beiber" and other fandom was driving me bananas. I just looked back when I was their age and remembered my obsession with "B2K" and fashion magazines. It is good to recall those good things.

Have fun, there is no better time to feel like you've lived. You may think you're not knowledgeable. I know, I feel like that often. However, to them, you are a marvel of information. They look up to you. Revel in that, it is a good confidence booster.

Smile often and laugh at yourself. Don't be afraid to laugh at them as well and if they are offended, tell them why. They will learn to laugh at themselves and not take themselves so seriously. Do it to also keep the atmosphere calm. There has been times Sherley has made me quite piqued but I've let it pass. It is not worth it, just laugh it off and let them know why. They will learn how to behave.

Make time. This is important. You can't just start and suddenly cut off. Life does not work that way.

Resources: These are some of my favorite quotes and my inspiration for this:

Abbe Faria: "In return for your help, I offer you something priceless."
Edmond: "My freedom?"
Abbe Faria: "No, freedom can be taken away, as you well know. I offer you my knowledge."
-The Count of Monte Cristo (film)

"Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction.
" John C. Crosby

"The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own."

- Benjamin Disraeli

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Nov 29, 09:27AM PST | 3 comments | 10 cheers