"since Mr Tiki is happy here, I am happy here too"
How I did it: For full perspective on this move, consider first we are a couple and have been for almost 18 years. We moved to Hawaii following a plan that was shaped and driven by me. It is not that Mr Tiki did not have a huge part in the whole thing, but it was my Big Plan. The treehouse, the wedding business, coming to be with me at the helm.
It took us both away from family and friends, and I gave up a good paying job and a better than OK work environment to follow a dream of running my own life.
The house we had lived in had been a vacation rental prior, and had been fairly popular. We moved in, brought in two dogs, and discovered in the two years we occupied the house that for us to live there year round, year in and year out, lots of changes would be necessary. We both recognized that we longed for more sunshine, and this was during drought time. I began to have eye problems. It was then we moved to the beach.
That was very cool, but there were issues that could not be fixed. The house was for sale, and once a buyer stepped up, we would have to move. So fixing the fencing there was not in our plan. The mosquitoes were a big problem. No screens on the doors, the only eating area out of doors... Mr Tiki got bitten every day, no matter what we did. Those bites itch like crazy for maybe 20 minutes, for most people. For him, there were enormous welts that took maybe an hour to go down. He was not happy, and the dogs could not go loose.
So every day, he would look for another place to live. I couldn't even tell this was going on, except every once in awhile he'd send me a picture of a house, and ask what I thought. One day he said to me, "If you go three days in a row without swimming, we are going to move." It was then I realized full on that it was simply time to go.
Within a day or two Mr Tiki found this house. The next day I put up this goal. I was not at all certain this would be the place for us, but Mr Tiki really loved it. There was the dog issue, and there were other people also interested in living here.
Mr Tiki put his full energy into being the family that moves into this house, and I got into that boat and rowed in the same direction. Within a couple of weeks, we were the ones invited to sign the lease.
We got a couple of friends to help with the physical move, brought everything in and unpacked 95% of it immediately. I decorated for the holidays, and three days later we had Christmas with friends over.
Lessons & tips: Many years ago I worked with a man who was smart and good looking, affable and seemingly unstoppable. He had a career in politics in mind at the time, and I thought for sure he would run for senate, and then either governor or aim for the White House. He was in a marriage that was rock solid. All in all an impressive not just person, but gestalt, if that makes sense. I asked him what the secret was to his marriage. He and his wife had met in grade school, and each other were all they had ever known romantically.
He told me they always rowed in the same direction.
That is one of the best questions I ever asked, and one of the best answers I ever heard. I have put it to use throughout my marriage, and Mr Tiki has too. It was by both getting behind this move that brought it about.
Resources: Friends for the move - friends we could ask and also pay. They were grateful as they needed the money for Christmas, and we were grateful as to do this alone would not have worked.
Craigslist was our source for finding the house. It is a flawed source, but it worked for us.
Some of the boxes we used we purchased, but others were produce boxes the grocery store was willing to part with. Those were great for hauling kitchen stuff as they are extra strong.
Steel wool and walnuts are great for taking the inevitable scratches off wood you move.
Jan 02, 12:36PM PST
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