How to stop cutting myself
How I did it: i just got through it. you will too, i promise.
Lessons & tips: these things helped me as a teenager:
- putting the things i would use to hurt myself in sealed envelopes, along with a letter to myself in the future when i was better. i would tell myself in the letter that i was glad i don't do this anymore, and explain all of the things that were bothering me. i'd try to imagine what kind of person i would be when i opened the letter and took out all of my sharp objects and didn't feel any of these feelings at all anymore. i would put the letters in a box in my bedroom. if you can though, give them to a stable friend or a family member to look after for you until you're ready to read them.
- drawing on myself with a red pen helped a lot when i really had to do something
- keep a journal, write whatever. scribble. draw. write nonsense words.
- try write down what it is that is making you feel the way you do in the simplest language you can. avoid vague stuff like 'i just don't care about anything' or 'i'm useless' or any of the stuff i sometimes used to write. trying to figure out exactly what it is that's bothering you helps you gauge how big of a deal it really is
- once you've done that, try to think of some things you can do to make yourself feel better about those things. if it's your body you aren't happy with, force yourself to write down at least one thing that you actually like about how you look, and then come up with one small positive change you can make to work toward changing something you don't like (a positive change - exercise more, not eat less). if it's something beyond your control like your home life (it was for me) then try to focus on what it will be like when you are in control. instead of hurting yourself, try to do one thing which will help you get a little closer to that place where you get to run your own life ('i cannot wait to go to college, i'm going to do the fuck out of some homework right now')
- remember that no matter how horrible this all feels, you are a worthwhile human being and it will get better
this is a good place to vent.
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