How to fall in love
How I did it: I basically just lived my life and we discovered each other unexpectedly. And the rest was history from there. ;)
There's so many factors to keep in account but I won't say everything, I don't want to write a novel here. But I was a person who had things pretty bad growing up. No father, irresponsible mother and no real guidance. I was very poor living in low-income housing. I never really thought highly of myself and had bouts of low self-esteem. So once I hit my teens I was vulnerable. And I was very co-dependent, meaning I couldn't stand it to be alone or single. I had to always have someone there. I couldn't love myself so I always felt the need to have someone else love me. I'd go from relationship to relationship. Nothing actually serious. Then 1 day I began seeing this guy and well I fell hard for him. He was my first love. He was sweet, gentle, and just about everything I felt I needed. We were a serious item after a month or so and then 4 months later he left me. He just abandoned me, because his family was against us being together for religious reasons etc. I was single for about 2 and a half years. Within those years there was a new sense of self-discovery. Suddenly my life had a meaning. I knew where I was, I never forgot where I'd been, and I knew where I was going, and I could do it alone if I had to. I didn't need to have someone there. I knew what I truly wanted and needed. After reading a Cosmopolitan magazine, I found an article interesting. It was about writing 10 non-compromising things your partner MUST have to be with you. Well I wrote it...and it was quite thought provoking. And I forgot about it. I met a man a few years older than I by pure randomness. And we didn't even hit it off at first, but after being friends for several months...I actually talked with him and spent time with him on Christmas night. I was a depressed emotional wreck. And with that night of endless conversation..more came. And after 4 months I knew he was someone I loved, now we're currently engaged and he's been by my side from thick to thin. He's absolutely the best thing that has ever happened me. I'm in university now, studying to be a doctor, he's been my #1 fan these years. This is definitely worth doing, whether you fell in love and got your heartbroken it's still a lesson and you take that and you learn from it but never let it hinder you. I was very skeptical and slow to fall for my fiance but I let my guards down and it was worth it! Every relationship you enter..or your past times of falling in love it's molding experience it helps you learn a lot about yourself and what you want and need it gives you your "appetite." Love happens randomly and when it's least expected. I wasn't waiting for someone or looking so to speak but we wandered into each other.
To conclude, I'm heading where I want to for the first time in life, each day is just another step closer to complete bliss. Not that everything is unicorns and butterflies but it's all worth it. I'm so thankful for him being in my life, I have someone who is always there, loves me endlessly, has sacrificed so so so much for me and shows his love in thousands of ways each day some big and some little. And is the reason I wake up enthusiastically each day.
Lessons & tips: Words of advice:
- Know who you are and be confident
- Know what you need and want
- Never settle for something if it's not exactly what you feel you want. (Ex: Like I used to just be with someone just to have them around and I'd imagine just accepting this rather than striving for what I actually wanted.)
- Don't force it, it'll happen (It's random, even when I was in a point in life I thought I didn't need anyone since I was still building my world, I still managed to fall in love)
- If you've been hurt don't let that ruin your chance at happiness! (We only have 1 life, we don't know how long it is, don't waste it)
Resources: Movies, books, and music kept me hopeful. Mostly being very self-aware of what I expected and wanted in a possible other half.
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