How I did it: I think the day that changed it all for me was when a bird tried to peck at my head---yeah, it seriously happened.  I was heading toward a vending machine and from the corner of my eye I saw a bird diving towards me ( I guess the vending machine was near the bird's nest and it was trying to protect the eggs)  and I completely freaked and ran away screaming, flailing my arms, my face contorting with fear.  And once I got into my car, safe from the bird, I started to hyper-ventilate and cried.   

That was really scary but more than that I was so embarrassed at how ridiculous my face must've looked when I was running away, that I decided then and there that this was no longer a "cute" little quirk, but a full blown, debilitating phobia that I needed to address. 

After a couple of weeks of recuperating from the horrible event, I went out to a park and sat on a bench and just watched the birds walk past me.  Mind you, I didn't encourage them to come near by tossing food at them or anything, I still won't do that, but I just let them do what birds do best, poke at the ground.  And that was okay.  Then, I practiced walking past by one bird, then by two birds etc.  This used to freak me out, whenever they flapped their wings, I used to jump away, which I think made them jumpy and flap their wings more. 

I think doing these "behavior therapies" alone helped me more than if I had relied on someone else.  When I was scared, I had no one to cling on to, no one to tell me that "there's nothing to be scared of ", so I had to come up with my own coping strategy.  Plus, I didn't really want to show anyone the extent of my fear, so it worked out well I think.  And once I became a little comfortable being around a bird, I practiced thinking about other things while the bird was still around.  Before, I wasn't able to concentrate when a bird was near, but with practice, it is possible. 

Lessons & tips: I sometimes still feel grossed out by birds, but now I don't fear them. Walking by them or eating al fresco with birds pecking at the crumbs on the ground is no longer a problem.  They just mind their own business most of the time. Once you experience being near one a couple of times w/o hyperventilating then you know that you can tolerate a lot more than you thought you ever could.  Take baby steps. 

Nov 30, 2008, 02:25AM PST | 0 comments | 2 cheers