How I did it: I just pushed myself to do it.  Being less reserved is a conscious alertness.  It's easy to stay quiet, in the back corner of a room.  It's considerably more difficult to look around, look for openings in conversations, think about the right things to say, and insert yourself into the social environment.

It's not as scary as you think it is.  And when you finally start a conversation with someone, you feel exhilarated.  Even if it is trite small talk, it feels good to talk to someone. 

Lessons & tips: Think about why you want to become less reserved.  I wanted to do this because I wanted to be a state HOSA officer.  I had to give an interview and a speech to 200 people.  I realized that networking by being open and friendly can get me places.  And, I make a lot of new friends along the way.

Always be alert to other people - this will make you a better communicator.  Just abandon your fears and get out there!  Talk to someone!  You don't have to be overly smiley and bubbly.  You just have to look approachable and give more than 'yes' or 'no' answers.  Ask other people questions about themselves.  Listen.  Tell them about yourself.  It's easy once you get used to it.

Resources: Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People

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Dec 05, 2008, 07:55PM PST | 1 comment | 3 cheers