How to be confident
How I did it: Ever since I was a tike, I was bursting with confidence. I knew I was pretty, I was slim, and I was nice. That came to a halt when my best friend told me I wasn't as popular as I thought I was (this was Kindergarten). Indeed, she was true, but it took a major toll on my self esteem.
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- Ugh, crazy as it may be, a Myspacedefinitely helped. Even though shallow picture comments may not be filled with truth, the detailed ones from friends and strangers alike that I could tell were honest made me so giddy. And I made friends with people in school I never talked with by sending message and comments, we have great conversations and I have way more friends now.
- Coming to terms with my faults. I know I'm not perfect, nobody is, but being able to admit them instead of shrinking when they're said aloud is much better, don'tcha think?
- Stopped caring what people thought of me. My friends tell me what people say about me, even negative ones. I used to cry over those, but now that I have more friends, I realize this happens to everybody. I thanked them for telling me what they said, because it helps me grow as a person. I didn't take things so personally, and I laugh at the labels and names, none of them are true, because they don't know me.
- Not wishing to be popular. I always wanted to be popular. I got to know a popular, and she backstabbed me, talked behind my back. She did this to everybody, and considered it normal. All of them talk about everybody negatively, and no one likes them except each other. I stopped moaning internally over the friends I should have, and started appreciating the ones I did have.
- I tested to get into Honors, and I got 3 out of 4 Honors classes (there are only 4 in total) I have almost all of the same people in each, and all of them are very confident and open because they all know each other, and it's a riot. It makes you succumb to the fun and be just as confident. "If they're having fun with their life, why aren't I?"
- I stopped comparing myself with others. "Ugh, she has more friends than me, she's not even pretty!" I know, I was a shallow self-esteem lacking girl, but I am just happy to have put that behind me. I started to get to know the people I had been jealous of, and I was proud to be friends with such awesome people.
- I got a new look. I was all name brands, you know, Hollister and stuff? 80% of the school wears that, even the "outcasts." Why? The popular people wear it, that is the only reason so many people wear it. It's just a T-shirt with a name brand made of cheap material that's overpriced, come on now!
I got side bangs, which I got tons of compliments for, and started wearing more eye-catching, popping clothes and shoes. I wear skinny jeans because I like the fit, and my legs are slender anyways, why wear baggy jeans? Ewe. My T-Shirts come from Hot-Topic, It's just my style. Your style is something you do not emulate from somebody else, you think "I like it!" And you get it. I used to think I could not pull off something humorous because I wasn't confident, which lowered my confidence, a vicious cycle.
- I am not afraid to be myself. I do wacky things that I think are funny, even if someone thinks of me unkindly for it. If someone thinks you are an attention whore for doing something like wearing something eye-catching (like your name on your pants with masking tape), that's probably because they wish they had enough confidence to do it too.
- YOU NEED TO ACT CONFIDENT BEFORE YOU BE CONFIDENT. Do these things even if you are not confident, and soon you will find yourself with more confidence.
- A boyfriend! Knowing someone liked my personality enough to ask me out? Um, yeah, that felt nice.
- Be honest with people. Being honest with people is the best way to start being honest with yourself.
Lessons & tips: - DON'T BE A POSER. I used to want to be scene. If you're scene, your scene. If you're a poser, you'll find yourself worrying about being labeled as a poser because you know you are.
- LABELS ARE FOR CANS, NOT YOU. Don't care what people think of you if they don't know you! It's not true, because they don't know who you are, just what they think you are.
- DO NOT BE AFRAID IF PEOPLE KNOW YOU LIKE SOMETHING WEIRD. I used to be a closet-pokemon dork. I was in love with it since I was a toddler, but I was ashamed because people open about it were considered weird. Now I wear any cute Pokemon T-Shirt I find. Why should I be afraid of someone knowing the real me?
Resources: Myspace
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