How to have an eating disorder
How I did it: I started to develop my eating disorder about a year and a half ago. It was great at first, you know, losing weight, feeling in control, it made my depression a little easier to handle. Yeah, then my parents found out, I went to therapy, hated life, and "got better". As soon as I stopped seeing my therapist I was restricting on and off until this past November, when my eating disorder got the worst it's ever been. I was eating 500-600 calories a day, sometimes less, at my lowest point. Over Christmas I got sick, but still had an appetite and mild nausea. I pretended I was very nauseous and had no appetite, and didn't eat for a few days, including Christmas and Christmas Eve. It ruined my holiday.
I decided I needed help and now I'm in recovery, and have been for almost a month. It's hell and I hate it, I've had a few good days but most days I just want to give up. I've gained five pounds already and I kind of want to die.
Anyone who wants an eating disorder has serious problems. When I was much younger, I wanted an eating disorder, because I thought it was glamorous and would give me attention.
Well, I got my wish.
Let me tell you, it's not anything like I would thought it would be. Eating disorders are illnesses, kill people every year, and mine has completely taken over my life. They're anything but glamorous.
