How I did it: I basically did what I've listed below.  I didn't think about him after my allotted time I set aside to be ultra sad.  (About a month.)  I found someone that I didn't get serious with right away.  And I let him prove to me that he wasn't going to hurt me over and over again.  Now, I'm in a wonderful, committed, trusting relationship.  I never saw myself here just over two years ago.

Lessons & tips: -Don't think about him/her.  I know that sounds obvious but it's the main thing.  If you have to "fake it til you make it" that's not a bad way to go, worked for me.
-Find someone new to put your energy into.  Wallowing won't help, as fun as it can be.
-Go ahead and read those old letters, listen to old songs.  Desensitize yourself so they don't surprise you when they reappear later.  But gradually fade these things out.  Remember what a cheating, lying bastard he/she is, and how he broke every promise he made you in those letters.
-When he/she starts talking to you again, be nice.  They're probably realizing how great you were.  But don't initiate conversation or drag it out unnecessarily long.
-Allow your new man/woman to, for lack of a better term, prove they're not going to hurt you.
-Delete your ex from facebook/myspace/livejournal/whatever.  Stalking is unhealthy and habit-forming.
-Write down everything that reminds you of him/her on a piece of paper, front and back if you need to.  Different fonts and sizes.  Let your emotions escape.  Then slowly burn, rip, or otherwise destroy it.

Resources: -Friends
-Sad music (but only for a little while)
-Stephen King
-watching movies/TV shows or reading books I hadn't before.
-my pets
-a private blog or journal to spew your feelings onto.
-a portable music device (Zune for me.  iPod and others work too of course.)
-friends with nice male friends that are single.
-male friends taking you out to boost that ego (don't use people, or lead them on)
-making friends with a family member of my ex to show I'm not bitter, and I'm not about to let him and his actions control my life

Mar 25, 04:55PM PDT | 0 comments | 1 cheer