"This was a very enlightening experience on several levels."
How I did it: I met a gentleman in a very sexy way on my way into a concert but thought I would never see him again; when the lights dimmed at the show and the opening band took the stage, I was shocked to see him pick up a guitar and start singing. To me. We made a lot of eye contact but I saw his wedding ring and was confident he was just using me for inspiration onstage. After the show, I was walking out and there he was. I said to him, "You played an awesome show. The most depressing part of my night was seeing your wedding ring," before walking away and not looking back.
I loved the band so I looked them up and befriended them on a social networking site. He sent me a message, I replied, and we went back and forth until that turned into e-mail and that turned into text messages. In this time I learned that he had an arrangement with his wife that involved his being allowed to have extra-marital oral sex. A few days later, however, he informed me that he had told his wife he wanted to sleep with me.
Her response? "Cool."
I wrote her an e-mail asking politely for her permission, and she granted it. She even said she would like to meet me (in a way that didn't feel negative at all--I feel like she genuinely wants to meet me and spend a little time with me.) The next day, I was in the city where he lives for another purpose and I stayed overnight so that we could make love.
I'm coming back down in a week to see his band play and we will be doing the same thing at that time. This might continue if everyone involved is comfortable; we are extremely attracted to each other and have lots of sexual chemistry. Because he lives 2.5 hours away and is married with a child, these liaisons would occur infrequently (monthly? every six weeks? whenever his band is near Greenville?)
Lessons & tips: Do not sleep with a married man whose wife has not given consent. Get the consent yourself; do not allow him to be the "go-between." Do not sleep with a man OR woman OR anyone with whom you are not in a committed monogamous relationship without a condom. Be sure that you are able to reconcile this act with your sexual morals. Do not become emotionally attracted to this man (save friendship and the obvious connected formed when making love.) Make him follow the rules: if he is supposed to be home before sun-up, come 5:30, kick him out of bed. Be totally uninhibited sexually. Go for broke.
Jun 10, 2009, 07:31AM PDT
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