How to enjoy the process on 43 Things

How to enjoy the process by Saturnsglow

It took me

1 year

It made me

"I learned that most waking moments offer a gift to be received. The gift is usually right in front of our eyes, but often we look past the offering because we are distracted with other more unimportant things"

How I did it: Wow, this goal encompasses so much. I learned to enjoy the process of life by not judging myself too harshly. I began to realize that even though others may not condone some of my choices, still I had to make decisions based on the truth that is inside of my heart and stand by those decisions.

And I knew that surely, if I live only to please other people, then an integral part of who I really am would finally give up and die inside. There came a day when I saw that in order to preserve my true self, that I could not ignore the true desires of my heart.

No longer am I completely enveloped with worrying only about how everybody else feels. This continual act of self-sacrifice for many, many years in an effort to please everyone else, except me, caused me to lose a key part of my identity.

It was sad to see the effect my unhealthy behavior had on my health, my mood, and my outlook, all in the name of not "wanting to be selfish". Finally I understood that only by being selfish to a degree, and taking care of me, was I able to offer anything genuine to others. At last I understood that I couldn't neglect myself and expect to be any good to anybody else.

By being an authentic person within, I have more to give and can take in life and definitely enjoy the process.

Lessons & tips: Tell yourself the truth.

Do not buy into the idea that most of the time, you have to be a martyr.

Be OK with getting angry at other people and in your own time, releasing that anger.

Give yourself permission to get to know the desires of your heart and gradually become strong enough to act upon your true feelings.

6 people found this helpful

Aug 10, 10:06AM PDT | 8 comments | 14 cheers

Comments:

Tristan is a soft, blank slate

I’m reading the works of Osho and he speaks of the exact same thing: that it’s good to be selfish. In that, you need to allow yourself to have happiness and love, and only then will it overflow and illuminate others. The overflowing of love and joy becomes selflessness in its truest.

Aug 18, 12:25PM PDT | Respond to this 2 cheers

truthsayer226 What we need are more ppl who specialize in the impossible.

Thank you for inspiring me

You sound very much like me. I want to live a life of self service but the price of what I lose in my identity is so high! I never seem to give enough to make anyone happy. My health has been severely affected also. I’ve decided that I’ve got to change this pattern of self sacrifice if I’m going to survive. I’ve got one of Osho’s books but I’m struggling with accepting what he has to say about selfishness. Intellectually I understand what he is saying but my heart can’t accept it yet. With time and effort, I recognize the patterns you describe as being in myself as well. If you can do it, so can I! I will learn how to be more selfish because it is for my highest good. If I take better care of myself, I will have more to give.

Aug 23, 02:11PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Saturnsglow Life is a plethora of labyrinthian complexity...yet still so simple.

I recognized

our kindred spirits very recently. Thank you for responding. Once you truly believe you are deserving, then you will receive your heart’s desire. And regardless of the outcome, you will spend your remaining days knowing that you have been true to yourself. It is a scary proposition, but so worth it.

_{Edit: This was written as an intuitive response meant to encourage you…not a response to imply that I have completely mastered the goal…It is a work in progress :)}

Aug 23, 02:37PM PDT | Respond to this 3 cheers