How I did it: For 7 years, I've gone without a dad. I hid in my room on every father's day and wished I had someone else's life....I'd pretend it didn't bother me to watch the brides having a "father daughter dance" at weddings, even though I knew I'd never have a chance at my own. My family seperated, both sisters choosing only one parent, leaving me to be the tie breaker. If I chose to see one parent, I'd lose the other. I was losing my heart piece by piece, never knowing when people would stop hurting me. I finally decided if my family really cared about me, they'd let me be happy-no matter what it cost them. So I found my dad and tried to mend the bond that was broken long ago. It made me feel like he wasn't my dad anymore. He had missed 7 birthdays, 7 christmas's, my first boyfriend, when I learned to drive, all of that, made it seem I didn't know who he was...he wasn't there for any of it. My mom found out I talked to my dad and she burst into tears. I couldn't bear to look at myself for the longest time. Though my mom forgave her mom for leaving her years ago, she still didn't understand how it felt. To this day, I talk to my dad, to protect my mom, I do it without letting her find out. I wish more then anything for me to get the chance to be ok, with both parents. If only they knew how this is affecting me....

Oct 12, 2008, 05:28PM PDT | 2 comments | 5 cheers