How to not push her away the next time she shows up
How I did it: I think the key to not pushing someone away is communication and faith. Not necessarily faith in God, but faith in yourself and faith in the person who has won your heart. There are going to be tough times and if your first inclination is to run when things get too serious or scary, you're going to need both faith and communication to come back down to a place where you can feel safe staying.
Give talking things out a chance. Learn to communicate what you need from a relationship. Learn to let your partner know how you feel without blaming them for it. That's important because more than likely they aren't trying to make you feel used or walked on or ignored or unappreciated. More than likely they feel they are taking care of their part of the relationship and are going to feel hurt if you blame them for your feelings.
Own how you feel and explain how while you understand that they don't do it on purpose, certain things can make you feel bad. Meet the person halfway on these issues and you may find that you have a staunch ally.
Life can be hard. Problems constantly arise and obstacles seem to be everywhere, but with communication and faith, home can be a safe place to recharge most of the time.
Lessons & tips:
- Forgiveness goes both ways
- Hugs are very powerful
- Empathy is invaluable -- if you have trouble with empathy, make a conscious effort to develop it
- Saying "I'm sorry" is necessary for both parties
- Don't try to "win" try to understand
- Solid relationships are a lot of work but they are worth it
