How to make an enormous, beautiful and delicious chocolate and beetroot cake with cream cheese frosting and walnuts for my friends, then drop it down the stairs so it breaks into several pieces and gets covered in cat fluff and I have to throw it away. by Absnasm

"Gaaaaaah, two bloody days all in all it took me to make that damn cake, and now it's in the bin."

How I did it: How did I do it? I spent ages lovingly baking a really yummy cake, and just as I was about to put it in the bag to take to my friends' house, the tin pinged out of my hands and the cake went flying down the stairs, covering the carpet in frosting and cake pieces and rendering it inedible and cat hairy (although I still ate a bit just to torture myself with how good it would have been), that's how I did it. Jesus. I think I may well be the clumsiest person alive.

Lessons & tips: I'd advise everyone not to do this. It was stupid. Apart from the cake-baking part. If you can do that part without the chucking-it-down-the-stairs part, do that.

Resources:


  • 75 g cocoa
  • 180 g plain flour
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 250 g castor sugar
  • 250 g cooked beetroot
  • 3 large eggs
  • 200 ml vegetable oil
  • Vanilla extract

Whizz
the beetroot into a purée and add the eggs, and then the oil. Mix the
dry ingredients in a bowl and add the beetroot purée. Bake at 180°C for
about 30 minutes.
  • Some stairs.
  • An over-ambitious concept of my own dexterity.


7 people found this helpful
 

Oct 18, 2008, 10:23AM PDT | 19 comments | 27 cheers


Comments:

Lisa

LOL! So funny:)

I’m so glad you can laugh about this now because you describe it so very humorously.:)

So sorry for the cake.

I’ve been watching a miniseries all about cooking in Korea in the 15th century, and when the kitchen ladies bring the food over to the King, I always think “don’t drop it! Careful now!” It hasn’t happened yet, but I always think that when they bring the King’s meal to him.

Oct 26, 2008, 08:04PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 2 cheers

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Humour, but tinged with a fuckload of bitterness.

God, that was a good cake.

A miniseries all about cooking in 15th-century Korea?! I love that you just drop that into the conversation, like that’s completely normal. What on earth are you watching?!

Oct 27, 2008, 02:09PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 3 cheers

Lisa

Dae Jang Geum.

You’ll see it on my goal list, too. It’s a 54 episode miniseries/soap opera about the Great Jang Geum, Here’s a clip from it when Jang Geum’s mother dies. This is early on in the series, i think episode 2.

So much of it is very sad, but it is a beautiful story about the first women to become the Royal Physician in the Chosun dynasty. I learned about it in acupuncture school. Before I graduated I bought from someone a copy of the whole series, and have been watching them for the last month, and now I’m hooked. I’m up to episode 27 now.

There’s an innocence to the character and to the story that I find refreshing. Almost every episode is a tearjerker, and there is so much love and affection expressed in the show which is quite different from a lot of American tv/movies. It seems like the whole world has grown so jaded. I’m really enjoying all of the heartfult emotion.:)

And all of the herbal cures and acupuncture points have been researched, so the show has also been educational.

There’s a movement to have it aired on BBC, so you might be able to see it soon. And it can also be purchased on dvd.

I’m glad you asked.:) I thought everyone watched tv shows about 15 century Korean kitchen ladies.;)

Oct 28, 2008, 09:53AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Ooh, looks splendid.

54 episodes though?! That’s quite excessive.

Just watched that clip and it made me all wibbly – tearjerker is right! Although the dodgy translation detracted from it somewhat. I work in a translations agency, and I used to be a subtitler, so that stuff irks me somewhat.

Oct 28, 2008, 02:48PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

Lisa

Yeah, I'm on #28.

I’m tearing up again….

The version I found on Youtube had terrible subtitles. I couldn’t find anything better there. The copy I have has the normal ones that go along the bottom of the screen.

Oct 28, 2008, 03:02PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

Oh good. - Absnasm

Kanard

Yikes! : }

I’m so so sorry!!

mmmpfhhhehe…

I know a little bit how that feels though.
It was my youngest’s birthday and we made her birthday cake together, a delicious chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and lots lots of M&M’s placed one by one by my little girl with so much care.
I assumed the cake holder was of decent quality and I held it by the handle on the way to the party place, right there in the parking lot the cake holder bottom snapped off and the cake fell top first in the concrete. You can imagine the following scene.
My then 4 year old never forgets that birthday, she forgave me because I scraped the bottom off and we were able to still have the clean layer.

Apr 07, 2009, 06:40PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Oof!

I’m glad you managed to salvage it and your little ‘un wasn’t too miffed. I hope you complained to the cake holder maker that their products aren’t fit for purpose. If they’d implied that your cake was on the heavy side you could have had them for slander. I think you missed a trick there.

Apr 08, 2009, 02:20AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Kanard

It was my fault,

I bought the cheap crappy thing because it was a dollar, I should have treated it as such and held it from the bottom.

: {

Bah!!

If at least our cakes had landed on someone we are mad at! It would have been a little bit worthy.

Apr 08, 2009, 11:16PM PDT | Respond to this 1 cheer

nicolasc is happy that spring is here...!

Huh. Lair. Ee. Us.

I mean, in a totally tragic and heartwrenching way, of course! It sounds like just the kind of cake I’d gorge myself on, too, out of sheer excitement at the eccentricity and genius of the recipe itself.

Apr 18, 2009, 09:38PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Absnasm is falling to pieces

It's a great recipe.

If you fancy making it, it’s here. But watch your step!

Apr 21, 2009, 01:36PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

nicolasc is happy that spring is here...!

Kewl!

I might just try it!

Apr 21, 2009, 09:03PM PDT | Respond to this 1 cheer

(This comment was deleted.)

Apr 21, 2009, 09:28PM PDT

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Ah, the little buggers!

They’ll eat anything if it’s not nailed down. My cat Askit is the same. Last night I was eating tablet that HA brought me back from Scotland at the weekend, and he kept trying to get a lick in.

Apr 22, 2009, 02:32AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

(This comment was deleted.)

Apr 22, 2009, 07:36AM PDT

Please see my new account - TurtleHeart is now TurtleHeart

Poor you! Sounds like a great cake.

May 14, 2009, 02:48AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Oh, it was.

I’m still mourning its loss. Of course, having it pop up on the front page of 43T, reminding me every day – that doesn’t help.

May 14, 2009, 09:51AM PDT | Respond to this

CrunchyBread ♥img by Mulya♥

SERIOUSLY LOL!

God, that is about the best “how to do it” I have ever read! I’m literally chuckling out loud and making a fool of myself.

AND I now want to find out how the hell you can bake a beetroot into a cake and not have it be weird.

Hey… I think I have some beets in my fridge…

You definately need to add “sense of humor that makes milk fly out of friends’ noses” and “can write like the devil” to your list of things you’re great at!

Aug 20, 2009, 09:03PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Aw, thanks.

Glad you liked it. Because I wrote it when I was annoyed at myself for being such a doofus it actually kind of annoys me sitting on my front page all the time and I’d like to shift it elsewhere, but it is quite a good piece of writing, and really encapsulates what I dick I felt at the time, so I’ll leave it there for all to see.

And you’re right! I am funny, and I can write like a demon. Yay! Thanks!

Did you make the cake? It’s bloody lovely. I haven’t dared make it again, the idea is kind of tainted for me now.

Aug 26, 2009, 01:28PM PDT | Respond to this 3 cheers

Zaleya

Sad thing

Well described.
Sad thing is that I can totally relate, for me it was the main dish for my very first dinner party, a beautifully prepared salmon fillet.
Cat got there in a hurry, too. Damned cat.

Oct 30, 2009, 10:51PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Absnasm is falling to pieces

Damned cat indeed.

I hope you had something else to fill the fish-shaped gap.

Oct 31, 2009, 05:16AM PDT | Respond to this


Absnasm has gotten 27 cheers on this entry.

 

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