How I did it: I stopped looking, reconnected with an old friend and fell in love. After 6 months, he proposed and about 2 years from our first kiss we got married. And we don't feel all that different. Not sure that's a good thing, but I hope so.
Lessons & tips: Don't think you can change whoever you want to marry.
Resources: Martha Stewart Weddings. Seriously. Also in the "I can't believe that made a difference" category is the self-help tome "He's Just Not That Into You".