How I did it: We'd been together for a year and a few months. Long story short: I went on a summer exchange program to a French school. When I came back, he wanted to break up. We'd had our little arguments in the past but it was nothing like this... nothing we couldn't solve if we sat down and talked about it calmly. Anyways, I allowed myself time to mourn for two weeks over our relationship and told myself everytime I was sad about it "Don't cry cause it's over, smile cause it happened." I knew I learned a lot from it and I knew if fate would have it, we'd be back together. I missed him more as my best friend than anything else eventually though. But anyways, I worked more on myself: I started toning up my body, I got rid of the things and people in my life that upset me, I raised my grades in school and I found I was happier. I think he noticed that too. A few months after the breakup, when we decided it was safe to be friends again, we started hanging out like friends. One day, we got into a small argument because I found out he told his best guy friend something that was supposed to be a secret and only between us. I challenged his trust and he got angry. Out of nowhere, he blurted "You're standing there doubting me and doubting that I ever loved you and doubting how much you can trust me.. and I still don't even know if I'm over you because I miss you so much." It all picked up from there again.

Lessons & tips: I learned the hard way that the worse thing you can do for the other person and yourself is to be needy and clingy and give them the idea that you can't live without them. Do the opposite: focus on your happiness and be independent. It takes time to get into the habit of doing that.. but take on some projects that'll help you grow as a person: start exercising, bring up your grades in school, eat healthier, join a new club or sport. You'll find yourself becoming more outgoing and more ready to face the world without him. He'll see that and eventually, question why you're broken up. And even if he doesn't, you'll find that you're happier and each day gets easier and easier without him. Good luck to all of you :).

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Mar 20, 2010, 05:52AM PDT | 1 comment | 4 cheers