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How to be more outgoing
How I did it: i was always to afraid to do anything because i cared too much about what people thought. and i was more judgemental of myself than anyone else so i thought everyone else was thinking the worst of me. i would be terrified of what i would wear becasue i wanted to look good so i gave no one anything else to judge me on. high heels made me feel confident but even a look from someone regardless or why they looked took that away from me. well when i actually started talking to some of the people who intimidated me for any reason i found out they werent judging me and they were just as worried about it as me. as soon as i found this out i was no longer scared about what people thought and i started to raise my hand in class and state my ideas or opinions without worry. i started to do things even though normally i would have been scared of being judged. now i do what i want. i dont think of what others think because if they dont like it, who cares. im happy this way and i realized it is so tiring always doing what i think others think i should.
im more outgoing, i can say things and i can take chances and now i end each day with no regrets, knowing that i took chances and i did what i wanted and i dont fear people any more.
you just have to have the mind set that ive been told a million times before but never believed, that no one cares, not in the bad way but in the no one is judging you way.
no one is as hard on you as you are, so if you think something about yourself you can be confident that if anyone else is thinking anything, its not half that bad. and its probably more along the lines of i love her shoes, or i wish i was that confident.
so go out there make a fool of yourself and do what you feel, because only you care about your failures, everyone else really only sees and cares about your success!
Lessons & tips: if you have to be like me and tell yourself your awesome and you look good or did a good job even if you dont belive it, say it anyway. you may not believe it now but you will. dont lose faith. and if you find one thing that makes you feel good even if its just for you and no one else knows, like my high heels or maybe its a saying or even funny underwear that makes you feel good then use that. and just keep telling yourself and everyone else that you are awesome. you may not believe it now, but you will, and everyone else does. when everyone tells you you look great, dont tell them you dont or think its pity, cuz if you looked bad they wouldnt say anything. and those stares really are jealousy, just like your mom told you, trust me on this, mom's are always right, why would she be wrong about that?
these phrases helped me, repeat them til you believe them
"Say whatever you like, truth is no one cares"
"Half the things you worry about, dont matter, so dont worry."
Resources: friends, family, classmates, teachers, and my high heels.