I've done 84 things
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1. find myself in a situation where it makes sense and is in fact absolutely necessary to say "frankly my dear, I don't give a damn"
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2. Send a slinky down an up escalator
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3. go up the down escalator and down the up
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4. Ride on the back of a motorcycle going at a moderate speed while wearing a hot pink helmet and a prom dress
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5. Wear prom dresses to go mini golfing
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6. say argh more...... argh
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7. Every time someone asks me to do something, ask if they want fries with that
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8. run through a busy street in a foreign city wearing pjs
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9. eat cottage cheese at 6 am
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10. know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, and know when to run
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11. Microwave a grape
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12. google myself
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13. use my credit card to pay for a 29¢ purchase
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14. have a house with hidden rooms and trap doors, and some kind of secret tunnel
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15. brush my teeth in the rain
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16. Go to a hotel for absolutely no reason except to use the amenities.
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17. take a bath with powdered milk
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18. make a hat out of aluminum foil
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19. embrace awkward moments
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20. make a dress out of duct tape
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21. ducktape somebody to the ceiling
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22. teach my baby sign language
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23. recite a Shakespeare soliloquy in front of lots of people who aren't expecting it (like in an airport terminal, or in a movie theatre line)
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24. declare war on punctuation
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25. drink wine late into the night and talk about something meaningless but seemingly important at the time with someone smart, funny and slightly dangerous
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26. spend my retired years sitting in a cafe in France, with a big black hat, pearls, black dress and gloves, smoking my cig that has a black long filter.
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27. go on a drunken camping trip
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28. glow in the dark
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29. create a coven dedicated to Isis
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30. Watch "The Wizard of Oz" at the same time as listening to Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon"
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31. Explain something through interpretive dance.
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32. create an interpretive dance for "bat out of hell"
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33. build a fort in my livingroom
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34. Sing, "The Wheels on the Bus" on a bus.
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35. Look for opportunities to say dramatic lines like, "You'll live to regret this" or "Hello, my name is Indigo Montoyo. You killed my father! Prepare to die."
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36. celebrate New Years twice in one year by crossing the International Date Line.
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37. Get a pet donkey, so I can openly and publically extol the virtues of my ass
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38. Pretend my house is haunted, so I can have paranormal detectives check it out and then laugh when they don't find ghosts
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39. Find out if the Hokey-Pokey really IS what it's all about
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41. have a miniature beagle
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42. mail a banana
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43. come up with a new English word
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44. howl at the moon
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45. make a "Waldo" dress and have someone find me in a huge crowd
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46. Get a parrot and teach it to talk like Yoda
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47. write dairy everyday
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48. Tell the next Jehovahs witness to come to your door about a great spaghetti monster
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49. Spread the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
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50. learn ALL the words to "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice
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