overcome my fear of public speaking

One of the requirements for a class that I’m taking is a 5-10 minute presentation (worth 15% of my grade) and I don’t have to present until towards the end of the quarter but even with just hearing the teacher mention/talk about it, I began to feel a high amount of anxiety. This is my issue with driving as well…;lakjd;laksjf;lkjsfl;jkasfl;jdsf;

...i’ve been really wanting to push myself to practice this more but my other classes don’t require presentations (statistics and p.e.)...i’m currently just taking 2 classes because that’s all i need to graduate…is it strange that in my hip hop aerobics class i can learn a routine and perform it without any anxiety whatsoever but when it comes to public speaking i just freeze up…maybe if i just dedicate even more time to practicing for my presentations similar to how i constantly do a dance routine over and over it may make things easier for me? hmmm…just a thought but i wanna try this thought out to see how it works out…i need something to allow me to do presentions somewhere…

i just wanna face my fear already because it’s to the point where i’m thinking about not going for my masters (teaching involved) just because of that one minor setback…;alsdkfja;dlfkjasdf…

i was thinking of maybe forming a support group at school where students or even the community can come together to support/give advice to one another similar to the support on 43things and practice future presentations, do small presentation exercises/games etc. etc.? it would be like taking a speech class but since it won’t be for a grade and because everyone will be going for the same purpose it will be a more laid back approach…i dunno if this would even work or how effective it may be…or is it weird since i haven’t even faced this fear yet?

so i had a presentation today…

over the weekend i was trying to think positively…i was telling myself i was gonna conquer this and that i was gonna do fine and that nerves are normal and…

...and presentations finally came and i was last to go…i totally forgot to self-talk to myself to help relax-i was really calm and it scared me because usually when i wait for my turn to present, my heart begins to beat hard and i get all sweaty and things shake and all that other good stuff…i then noticed that i started working up my nerves as i saw other people’s nerves while they presented…

then yeah i got up to present…things went fine at first …i was calm and i was smiling…(still, not normal)

then i heard the timer (damn timer) which beeps every minute to let you know how much time you have left…then that’s where it all went downhill…after the first beep…

i lost all focus and forgot i had PowerPoint to refer to…forgot i had an outline…oh gosh…in my head i was freaking out when all the help was right there in front of me…

so the worst thing possibly happened today…i froze…for a good 3 minutes…HORRIFIC!!! i did end up finishing but man did i hate it…i saw people’s eyes looking at me like…poor poor girl!!!!! all i could think about after class was shit…this really really sucks…

i need to overcome this soon…not just for the sake getting through presentations but for my own personal growth…i want to look this fear in the eye and tackle the hell out of it…
guess that just didn’t happen today though =/