The idea of letting bygones be bygones. I wish I could leave the past where it is, but I can’t. I’m one of those girls who gives everything she has into a relationship, regardless of how old I am, regardless of how bad the guy is for me, I give him everything I have, including money, so I’ve lost a few hundred dollars to each of my previous relationships. The first one I’ve nearly forgotten, at least all the really negative stuff, just little details here an there, like the model kits he used to build or the songs we would listen to. The most recent ex (a near two years ago now), still pains my thoughts. I wish I could get the truth out of him, as I suspect there being somebody else that came into the picture that he was enjoying more than me, besides the drugs, anyway. I just wish I knew what made it really fall apart, since that was the most difficult one. And though I felt that the first guy I was with was going to be it (how naive I was at 14), I fell much more hard for the second guy, so it was that much more heart breaking when we went our seperate ways. It’s difficult to forget that one, as I’m still friends with his mother, who is an amazing woman, and thinks he’s an imbecile for F*ing up with me…but she’s glad I’m happy with my new guy. We’re helping each other, as he had a very long term relationship before me, and my ex’s both lasted nearly 3 years, but I don’t know if I’ll ever forget them, I just want to forget the negative stuff, and leave that bitter after taste that I get when I think about him behind for good.
