improve my self-esteem

The goal is to improve it and that is what I have done. I have not completed all of the 31 weeks of exercises but I think that is irrelevant. The exercises will surely continue to elevate my self esteem.

My current level of self esteem is so much higher than it was six months ago. It has taken a lot of work and I am far from being finished. There are subtle hints in everything that I do that indicates to me that this has indeed happened. So onward and upward we will contnue to travel down this road. Proud to have come so far.

word of the week – definition.

to live a life of purpose then you must define what it is you want.
define my dreams, my goals, my wants, my meaning

I have a dream for my life I must set out to fulfill.
I need to be clear on my goals and actively pursue them.
I want to be happy, to anticipate, with enthusiasm, every day.

Live life on and with purpose!
Be purposeful in all that I do.

Monumental! I love that my attitude towards myself is changing but I find that it is also changing towards other people. Behavior that I thought was acceptable before does not seem so acceptable now. As I raise the standard for myself, I feel like I am also “unconciously” raising the standards for other people. I don’t know if this is fair.

Any thoughts?

word of the week :significant

Treat my life as important, don’t let anybody, friends, parents, kids, co-workers use me.
I need to stick up for me.
I don’t always have to be “the better person” by conforming to other peoples needs.
I need to live “my” dream, because my happiness is important.
Just because my parents made me feel like I didn’t matter, doesn’t mean I don’t.
My parents inability to show love, thier insecurities do not mean I am unloveable, they do not define that aspect of me, I do.
Trust my heart in the open. learn to be more comfortable being vulnerable, as I get stronger I need to trust myself that I will not let others take advantage of me.

word of the week would have to be, “assertiveness”

practice self-awareness.
learn to say no more often.
recognize my needs.
ask for what I want.
be who I am instead of who I think others want me to be.
do not dissappoint myself.
be honest with myself when it comes to my secrets.
forgive myself for my mistakes.
realize my potential.
question anger.

word of the week : “choice” and the responsibility of choosing

I have a choice to

stop “worrying and thinking” and start “enjoying and doing.”
accept my aloneness and learn to have fun alone.
trust my intuition and make better decisions.
hold myself to a higher standard.
validate my feelings and respect them for what they are.
be responsible to myself.

hiding from choice is still making a choice. It is called avoidance.

It is amazing how some books can teach you no matter how mny times you read the book. this is one of those books. It really just sucks me in. I don’t think I have ever read a book so quickly before. Well worth the effort.

word of the week: self-awareness

I create the limitations in my mind.
My abilities will match my confidence level.
I let myself or “make” myself overwhelmed.
I need to walk “my” walk through this world.
Ask for help, you are not less because you need help.
Be real about my perceived inadequacies.
Your feelings are just as important as other peoples.
Passivity is your enemy.

the word of the week “self-responsibility”

get clear on what I want for my life.
treat myself with love, kindness and respect.
look at the goals that shape my future.
my happiness is my responsibility.
learn the difference between work and play.
relax, have more fun, smile, laugh.
happiness- name it to claim it.
be more responsible about my choices in what I accept into my life.

it kinda makes me laugh now but Amber was quite serious when she made her suggestion. (that was this afternoon by the way) I think that this is a goal that you move through with leaps and bounds and then you level out, then you move again, like the old leap frog game as a child.

Some interesting people came through my life recently, with them came some great conversations and some amazing personal awareness and growth. Not always easy growth, some of it hurts. Some of it is difficult and not easy to face or work through. As I was explaining some of my realizations to Amber, I began to cry. I have always been a strong woman and my girls are not used to seeing me vulnerable. I think it takes them by suprise when it happens. The cry made me feel better and I am moving onward again. I don’t think I need a therapist, just a shoulder once in a while.