Charisma is a skill that everyone can improve upon. Merely being confident is not enough. You also have to be able to hold intelligent conversation and disclose limited information about yourself which wont break social etiquette.
This is an eternal goal, and many people abandon it as they get older because it requires constant upkeep. Who ever heard of a great comedian who has been doing the exact same act for 45 years? It requires you to continuously and consciously seek out new material and interesting things to hold conversations over.
I don’t know anyone who is actually an expert at being charming and charismatic. However I do know that confidence which is unfocused to the topics of conversation can end up disastrously. If someone is talking about a trip through wine-tasting country you should know that no matter how confident you act, you will commit a major faux pax if you say that white wine goes great with pork tenderloin.
Nothing is more damaging to charisma than appearing like a cardboard cut-out who has nothing to offer to a conversation.
- Smiling helps.
- Confidence helps.
- Cleaning up your appearance helps.
- Understanding the back and forth rapport of socialization helps.
- Being witty and entertaining helps a lot.
- For the Love of all that is holy- REMEMBER THE OTHER PERSONS NAME. -that helps considerably.
- Being able to contribute to a discussion in a meaningful way helps most of all.
I’d suggest reading up on interesting and funny things. Check out some random trivia books anything from Mental_Floss or even Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers. Cruise the web, find out what is going on throughout the world- celebrity news, or up and coming inventions. I’ve found that neatorama and trend hunter can be invaluable for finding things to start discussions over or to augment conversations.
I’d also recommend taking a serious look at how comedians perform and what their subject material is. Getting people to laugh is intoxicating and makes them want to be around you. Confidence helps you to be able to deliver this kind of information, but when it is unfocused and ill researched you will appear shallow and unfamiliar with social norms.
