Hmmm. I’m “sort of” dating and it’s “kind of” serious. Well, I thought I wanted it to be. But my girlfriend (if I can call her that) seems to merely tolerate me. We just had a week when I was away – I got no kind of send off and no kind of welcome back. Tonight I wanted to give her a back massage but she’s told me not to go round because she wants to watch a dumb “Celebrity Love Island” reality TV show. I’m kinda tired of being indoors so I’m wandering around the town thinking of going to a restaurant (a new one has just opened) and how sad that is going into a restuarant alone. Then I see all the couples on the gorgeous summer night and I’m thinking like a lonely single guy “It would be so nice to have a girlfriend on a night like tonight” then I have to REMIND myself that I DO have a girlfriend, she’d just rather watch TV than get a back rub, and rather stay in than enjoy the summer or great food and atmosphere. I don’t think I can sustain this. We were thinking of going on a cruise, but naturally I’m thinking “What’s the point!?” I’m outta touch with the dating standards these days. Am I expecting too much if I dump this woman, or am I expecting too little by staying with her? MOstly it feels wrong and I feel continually hard-done-to, let down and disappointed in her.
J.
