Be happy with and appreciate what I have

It has been ages since I’ve written down any goals in 43things. I have lost the weight I needed to, and exercise has become a way of life for me (that I can no longer live without…yippee!!). I believe that writing down my goal was the vehicle that made me believe that I could accomplish it.

My Christmas morning was spent doing a 3 mile jog around my neighborhood. I waved to people who I’ve befriended on the street since I’ve started jogging, and the funny thing is that we don’t know each other’s names, but frantically wave at each other as I pass them by. How wonderful is that??!!

In comes a bubble buster! Here’s my toxic people story:

A few days ago I went for a drive with the same co-worker that I written about in my previous entry (the one who wants a caviar life). Well, we decided to take the day off and drive to the North Shore. I was in a particularly good mood (despite just breaking up with someone I’d been seeing). I decided that my cup is half full! So anyhoo, I sit inside her car and she tells me that she has a sore throat. “Why?”...I ask. “Oh I scream in my car while I’m driving. It’s a great stress reliever.” she says. She proceeded to deflate my colorful bubble by telling me all of her life’s woes (that I seem to have heard about for the past two years), but this time I was trapped in her car for 4 hours. I tried looking out of the window at the big waves, trying to redirect my energy that was being drained….but the parrot next to me kept on and on about her life being unfulfilled and her family taking advantage of her.

I will never settle for a mediocre life filled with despair. I will never be a parrot who refuses to change my life when I am unhappy. Life is short, go for the gusto!!! She was able to deflate my colorful bubble for a few short hours, but I truly appreciate my life and the optimistic dreamer that resides within me brought my beautiful happy colorful bubble back to life!

dreams of a caviar life, but lives in a small house in the country. She wears what seems like the identical shirt every day…in many colors. Her brother gave her what she brags is a “designer” sofa that he no longer wanted. She told her teenage kids that they were not allowed to sit on it while eating, and she promptly covered it up to preserve it. I told her to set it free and enjoy it. She looks at me as if I’m crazy because why can’t I understand that she doesn’t want it to get dirty. Hey, if it gets dirty at least it had a life! Covered up, it may as well be from the country….never fulfilling her caviar dreams:o)

I believe that our happines is based on our perspective on life. If we feel we will fail, then failure will be the probable outcome. If we live outside of a paradigm, then we can fly. I was surrounded by so many people this week who seemed like lost souls. One encounter I had was in the Supershuttle, where a car load of people next to me (in a very nice car) were yelling at a guy in a car in front of my shuttle. They were upset because they believed that he cut them off. They felt like they found revenge when the guy stopped at the red light not far in front of them. I could see inside the guy’s car, and he was looking at a map. He didn’t say a word to them. Then I heard a little voice saying “Daddy, say it again, I like when you said that, say it again daddy!....say the ‘hell’ word, say the ‘hell’ word daddy.” The little girl could not be more than 7 yrs old. I didn’t hear the father apologize to her for saying those things to the man, or telling her how wrong it was to act out in anger. I only heard the sound of my thoughts.
The person who was in charge of the workshop that I attended pee’d on herself during the first day of class. I realized the poor lady has problems walking and is extremely over weight, and didn’t make it to the bathroom. She was stuck in the front of a training room, soaked, for the rest of the day, confined to a chair, in hopes that no one would see her embarrassment. I thought about the fact that her difficulty in walking was probably limiting her from doing so many things that I do so effortless (and that I CHOOSE not to do). There is no certainty that I will be this healthy long term. So I am so grateful for my health, my compassion and the peace that I feel inside.
I was at the tennis courts on Saturday on a beautiful Hawaii morning, with the tradewinds blowing as I was talking-story to my friend, enjoying my surroundings, and feeling so grateful for where I am. I hope and pray to continue to recognize and grab the opportunites that I have been gifted, and for not staying down long enough to not see the light and the lesson.