I decided to keep a video blog of my weight loss journey because there’s something so powerful to me about seeing and hearing myself on camera. Not that the written word doesn’t mean a lot too, but for some reason talking into a camera makes me feel more accountable than simply writing in my journal the way I’ve done in the past.
Right now, I weigh in at about 246 lbs. My goal weight is 190lbs. My ideal weight for my height, body type and personal comfort is 170lbs.
I’m a yo yo dieter and I struggle to stay motivated. I’ve found that thinking of my obesity as a disease, living a healthier lifestyle as “treatment” and eating more fruits, veggies and lean meat as “medicine”, I’ve been more positive and motivated.
The longest I have ever gone in terms of improving my eating habits is a week on the Atkins diet. Then, I made the mistake of getting on the scale and seeing I had lost no weight. I followed the diet to a T, so that was extremely frustrating. This time, it’s all about the small stuff.
You know, signs of more energy, my knees not creaking/cracking/aching so much. A pair of jeans that nearly cut my wind off and give me severe muffin top first fitting and eventually becoming loose. I’m trying very hard to create a “diet” that not really a diet in the traditional sense, but a new way of eating and exercising that I can live with. Obviously weight loss is a serious motivator, but I also want to be healthy.
Right now I am feeling tired like I want to take a nap, but my hair is wet, so I’m going to try and sit up a bit longer and research health and weight stuff so my hair can dry.
I am also going to transcript my handwritten food log for today incase I lose the notepad I’m keeping it on.
Breakfast (8:15 a.m.)
-1 smiley bowl of Special K
-2 cups of mean green (1 bunch of kale, 1 cucumber, 1 zucchini, 2 pink lady apples, 1/2 lemon and 7 strawberries)
-1 “one a day” energy vitaman
Thoughts:The cereal is great! Delicious! The mean green sat overnight and it tastes sour from the half lemon. I had a hard time drinking it. I cut my vitamin in half. It felt weird, like it wanted to get stuck in my throat, but the mean green washed it right down, so I guess that stuff did come in handy. I was very pleased not to get that disgusting, “vitamin flavored” burp that occurs when I take my vitamins whole.
Supplement (10:40 a.m.)
I had some qualms about taking the pill because in the past, it’s given me some pretty nasty side effects such as dry, cotton mouth, insomnia (i’d feel exhusted, but the medication would keep me awake. i didn’t sleep almost 3 days once), and once it made me so euphoric, I almost drove off the road because of all the “pretty colors” and the way the sun was reflecting on the land. *smh
-1 mixed green salad with cut up chicken thigh, shredded parm. cheese and 2 tbsp of Caesae dressing (280calories)
-1/2 bottle of water
Thoughts: The salad was actually really good. However, I did start to feel hungry from breakfast during my workout and while I took a shower. The supplement made me feel weird about 10 minutes into my lunch. I felt kind of hyped up and shakey and my handwriting is very loopy and lazy on the notepad. Good thing I’m not driving a car this time!
I’m not sure what I am going to eat for dinner. I would love to go veggie, maybe some black beans and zucchini. Learning to eat vegetables is very hard for me. I don’t like any of them except maybe carrots and even though I don’t eat very much of that.
I don’t necessarily want to become a vegetarian (at this point) but I do want to cut back on my meat eating. I enjoy pork, beef and chicken. I hate fish, which sucks because fish is supposed to be good for you. Unless it’s fried, fish tastes nasty to me, and even when it is fried up and golden brown, I’m always concerned about bones.
Anyhow, I have to clean up my room soon, so let me finish up with my exercise for the day -
1)30 minutes on the eliptical = 337 calories burned. Avg HR: 168bpm. Highest HR: 187 bpm
2) 50 reps on the inner thigh machine set @ 85 lbs. (I began to feel the burn around 20 reps)
3) 20 reps on the seated leg curler set @ 55lbs. (Ouch! I kept feeling like I was going to get a cramp in my thigh or calves)
Snack (3:08 p.m.)
-1 pink lady apple
Normally I would’ve grabbed the bag of Utz, White Cheddar popcorn. But, lucky for me, my mind was on “healthy” so I found myself about to grab a Mango-Apricot Dannon Lite yogurt. Then, I remembered I have some pink lady apples that will go bad if they’re not eaten or juiced soon, so I sliced one up and that’s what I’m having now. We’ll see how long it lasts me. Hopefully until 5 when I’ll cook something for dinner. It’s going to be hard, but I am going to try to go to bed early again tonight. I read that lack of sleep results in overeating because your body is trying to make up it’s tiredness by eating extra calories. I pray that not only will I stay motivated, but that I will lose some weight. One bite at a time, one bite at a time…You can do it Ari!
Dinner (5:20 p.m.)
-2 cups of black beans with 1 sliced up chicken thigh
-1 serving of Dannon lite and fit (mango)
I was hoping the apple would hold me over a little longer, but around 5 i started to feel very hungry. i hope it’s okay that i put hot salt in the beans. they taste amazing with the chicken. now i need to think of other stuff i can cook for cheap that’s not high in calories.