never give up on myself

because there is a reason I am struggling, there is a reason I want more for myself, there is a reason I am driven to find my happiness…
I deserve at least as much love and support as I give to others; my analytical mind will not let me disprove that. so what choice do I have but to NOT give up? sobering, true. But its an opening instead of a finality.

I guess all the years I’ve been usings preceeded all the years I’ve been depressed, anxious and suicidal. Only yesterday by admitting I am powerless over alcohol and resolving that I do want to stop drinking does my self-esteem and happiness really have a chance. I am so thankful and grateful to be exactly where I am right now. Finding God again gives me so much strength, I can finally feel myself going through what I’ve been wanting to go through for so long. I know its only been a day or so, but I have great hope for myself.