relax more often

Well, I must say that I am a bit amazed that I have been able to be a bit more relaxed than normal during this vacation. I haven’t had all too much mental problems (my anxiety and fear neurosis), which means I have been quiet calm! Too bad that tomorrow is Sunday and the last day of holiday and that the day after tomorrow I’ll be sitting at work again. Already from yesterday I started to feel nerves and stress again, making me already freaking. I’m only 27 and already would like to be home all the time, doing whatever I want. Oh well… we’ll see how everything evolves. I definately have to try to get more calmth within myself. Maybe I can make that a new goal grins.

Relaxing is for me impossible, or as good as impossible. I have an anxiety / panic neurosis, because of which relaxation is as good as unexisting. When I try to relax, my anxiety kicks in, not wanting to allow me to relax.

But, I try because else my body will be ruined in no time. Being on holidays, I more or less relaxed this afternoon a bit. I had cut this branch of a hedge and peeled it clean of it’s bark and was waving it around like a kid. I must say, acting like a kid does relax some times, it makes you go back to those days when there were no worries.