stop being a pushover

used to really like having this fren around..till she move over and kept coming to my house to eat whenever she’s hungry..wonder why she’s not more considerate and at least offer some dishes once in a while rather than eat for free all the time..sigh.. but, it is difficult to bring up this matter..don’t want to affect the friendship esp when she’s having family problems..sigh….any advice?

I hate myself for being a pushover.. I guess I have such a strong desire to please others and am very afraid of being scolded by others or being disapproved by others. Sometimes, I think that it is because I cannot really approve and accept myself and so has been relying on external approval. But, I am sick and tired of being a pushover! Yet, the strange thing is that when I start being assertive, I worry non-stop and ended up feeling guilty about whether I was being selfish.. Sigh.. However, I know that I cannot afford to be a pushover as this is not the way to help others too. I need to be true to myself and be kind to myself too.