understand

Sometimes, you just need to be.
No feelings, no this, no that, no when or then, no ifs or coulds,
no yesterday or tomorrow. just right now. Just here. Just as it is.
Reflect on the reality of it, turn it around in your hands, examine every aspect of it. Marvel in all the little details that go unnoticed.
Slow down and simply be.

This betrayal burns. Hot and white. You smile and deny and I know. I know the truth. I’ve seen the evidence in a three inch LCD screen. You are tied to this electronic tether, it’s so important. Such much to take care off, work work work. But how come it’s his name that I always see? You think I’m unaware, you think I don’t know. You’re so clever, but you don’t realize that in your excitement, you have shown your hand. Dipped it just enough for me to see what game your playing. Your words have started ringing hollow. And I am angry. I am angry. But mostly, mostly, I am deeply saddened, because I no longer trust you. The feeling that trust used to give me was like a warm blanket for a shivering soul. All the words in the world will never bring that back. Enjoy him, eventually he will find out who you are.
As for me, I know where I stand.

To understand. That is all I want. Not everything all at once, just the one thing that unlocks all the others. The thread of thought that when pulled will unravel the blindfold. To understand. Just one thing.