Post Random Ramblings

finaly, you know it took 4 weeks for future shop to tell me didnt do anything, but they LOST my laptop in the store. Are you serious… any way after i call everyday for a week they finally STOPED ANSWERING MY CALLS!! So outraged I went to the store asked for it back , and it took them 2 hours to find , thier advice for next time was to CALL AHEAD!...

one thing after another have been turning up in my favor, even the small things count to me. Like winning a little lotion at a store, or finding out I got a four on my exam. Then a wonderfull woman wanting to buy my paintings from me! It’s all good for me, then later I found out that I had a late final payment from work and so I had a nice little bonus waiting for me to go and enjoy my time with friends and family. I’m exhausted sore and sunburned from a day at the fair and even though I had some big problems I still had lost of fun and I didn’t think I could have this kind of balance in my life for a long time, and when I least exspected it it came.

I’m Really happy and excited and so so proud to be a new owner of a 4!!! A 4 in what you ask? Well a 4 in my Advanced Placement Studio Art class !!! The marking is out of 5 and I got a 4! Four! I’m totaly shocked, I’ve always known my art isn’t bad but I also knew that it wasn’t jaw droping. But appearntly that was all in my head because I got a 4! a four!! I’m the second student in my high school to even get a 4 in the 8 years we’ve had this program!

AP course and provides students with the opportunity to earn credit and/or placement in college. Exams are scored by college professors.

AP GRADE QUALIFICATION
5 Extremely well qualified
4 Well qualified
3 Qualified
2 Possibly qualified
1 No recommendation

AP Exam grades of 4 are equivalent to grades of A–, B+, and B in college. AP Exam

So out of 25000 students only 3300 get a 4!

I’m back on old faithfull 43, after being gone for how ever long…
“what where you doing and where ere you” you ask

Well nowwhere and i was doing nothing. I guess I needed a break.

But during that time im made progess on a few goals and ive come up with new ones.

And most importatly I’ve come up with a game plan for my future. I’ve decided what i want to do! I want to be a Drug addiction counsellor, and one day Ill go on about why. How am I going to get there you ask? Well like 7 out of 10 jobs in life now-a-days, Schooling. But Chantel your grades suck, you say, well indeed they do but appearently not that bad. But Chantel you need a Bio-30 class for your program, you say, well thats ok i said i had a plan, I’m going to go SIAST with is right here, so Im going to siast to get my grade 12 Bio and to get them professionals to tell me everything i need to get, like it my grades need upgrading and stuff, best part about that is i wont have to work because they have a program wich if you go to school full time they pay you to do it, and semsters are only 2 months. then from there im going to go to college in medicen hat and stay in dorms and probably not work for the first year.and thats the plan.

About a month ago we got this new crazy bitch for a boss. Now when I say crazy I mean like crazy scream oh the top of her lungs and red in the face because some one signed out 2 mins early. Anyway she came in and made these new rules up such as, the brooms and dustpans have to be kept in the fernace room wich is 30 feet from the area we work, and that not a big deal, the thig is, we have to sweep every hour! So it’s anoying as hell. Also shes flips ape shit over dum things, like when I called to ask when my shift was, she screaming at me on the phone saying I’m rude, lazy and irresponcible, all because I needed to make sure that I was suposed to come in…

The bright side is…

It dosn’t much any more. Because I quit! I’m done on the 5, if that, I asked to be done on the 2nd but she said no,i need to stay untill the 5th and I said I kinda need to be, I’ll make arrangments to try and be both places at once but yeah… I’m only human and so might just say fuck it.

Anyway, the reason I wrote this is because I got this poem that explains how I deal with her. Kill her with kindness.

A Poison Tree

I was angry with my friend:
I told my wrath, my wrath did end.
I was angry with my foe:
I told it not, my wrath did grow.

And I watered it in fears,
Night and morning with my tears;
And I sunned it with smiles,
And with soft deceitful wiles.

And it grew both day and night,
Till it bore an apple bright.
And my foe beheld it shine.
And he knew that it was mine,

And into my garden stole
When the night had veiled the pole;
In the morning glad I see
My foe outstretched beneath the tree.

William Blake

I don’t know what to do. It’s just not enough anymore. I’m just done with everything. I’m tired. I’m just so so tired. Every thing here is just not even half decent I’m tired of my shity job, I’m . tired of working all the time,and I’m tired of getting not even a half decent wage. I’m tired of coming beck from work, to a not evenhalf assed house. With not even half assed fixed cars in the front and not even half an effort failed at trying to make the front yard look nice. Even the city’s not even a half ass attemp at cleaning the streets. I’m just so tired of it all. My life is not even, it’s not balanced. Not half, not full, not empty, but not even half. Not 100%, not 50%, not 0% but some where between 45 and 15. It’s not good, it’s not ok it’s not even bed. I’m just so tired of this. I’m getting depressed. I hate it and I’m tired of it all. I’m tire of sharing a house with 6 and was built for 4. ‘m tired of these people. I’m tired of living this life. And I’m tired of trying every to pretend it’s ok when it’s not ok, because it’s not bad it’s not good it’s not even ok.

And I know it could be worse. I could not have a job, or a house or poeple. But atleast when it bad it can only get better and then you have something to look foward to.

So the same dumb ass who took my shoes, has now taken my fucking jeans. My favorite jeans. My most exspensive jeans. The point is, he’s eating all the fucking food in the house, right down to the unsalted soup crackers, He’s invaded the whole house, serious, he even has walked in the bathroom with out knocking a few times. Like wtf? your a visitor staying at our house for free, the least you could do is knock… He’s taken my shoes and now my jeans, that are obviously girls boot cut jeans, and are way too big for him. Whats next sleeping in my bed, wearing my bra. Wtf?? I’m so sick and tired of the bull shit I have to put up with everyday.

Ok ok ok, now I know my parents care more about thire friends well being then their childrens mental state, and that’s why I’m fucking freaking out. They invited thire friend over for the god damn month, and you know I would normaly be fine with that, if they didnt already have a room-mate, and a nepew over almost 24-7. IN A 3 BEDROOM HOUSE, not to mention the fucking room-mate has friends over like it’s going out the style. But the thing that has sent me fucking flying over the deep end is that MY BRAND NEW SHOES THAT I BOUGHT WERE ON THE FEET OF THE HOMELESS FUCK IN THE BASEMENT!!! Seriously?!? WTF??? Who the hell where another persons shoes? A womans shoes that are like 3 sizes too small for you??? WTF? DON’T WEAR SOME ONE ELSE’S SHOES??? Don’t fucking touch whats not your’s! Don’t act like you don’t know! And don’t say some said you fucking could!! CAUSE NO ONE WOULD SAY YOU CAN WEAR MY FUCKING NEW SHOES!!! And the best thing is that my goddamn parents don’t give a flying fuck in the world.

It’s about time I realized that my problem is not my parents and thire problems, but that the problem was that I had a problem me haveing a problem with them and thire problems.

If some one is going to follow the dumb blond stereotype, then I’m gonna treat you like a loser, and the same applys to the other stereotypes.