be less self-conscious

This is inspired by the peeps on 43!

1. I finally have a job (9-6, and it pays)
2. I know some really cool people- that must mean I’m cool too! :)
3. I am finally undertaking “The Artist’s Way”
4. I am learning to be responsible and good to myself.
5. I know when to say ‘No’ – more often than I used to.
6. I can and have ‘just done it’.
7. I have done things I never imagined I would do.
8. I have survived a nightmare.
9. I don’t lie.
10. I have no more hang-ups about my body.
11. I finaly learned to let go people I could not keep.
12. Most of the time, I like myself.
13. I am confident about writing (most of the time)
14. I am an idea-center, full of ideas.
15. I love it when I can give a good talk or a good massage.
16. I can give a good massage.
17. I am slightly better about keeping in touch.
18. It shows how I feel, so I don’t usually have to hide. I clap my hands when I’m happy :)
19. I bought myself Earl Grey Tea.
20. I made a bookmark with my hands.
21. I took a trip to UK on my own
22. I put up a picture of Oscar Wilde on my wall. I have read only one play and countless quotes of his.
23. I always manage to embarrass myself and so don’t run into the problem of taking myself too seriously.
24. I have admitted that I was wrong in hurting people that I did.
25. I have a good inner compass.
26. I can focus – when I’m on a roll I won’t notice if there’s a thunderstorm outside.
27. I am vegetarian (eggetarian).
28. I gave the arranged marriage assistance a try.
29. I know the perfect gift for my friend E, and M :)
30. I bought materials for the gift for my friend E. I want to make it myself.
31. I am finally genuinely interested in the world around me.
32. I insist on respect.
33. I’m getting there.
34. My boss likes my work.
35. I like quality in work.
36. I don’t mind being “poor” (relative definition). I take it as a challenge. (having said that, there are times when i have been super-stingy which i ain’t proud of)
37. I can be funny.
38. I want to give.
39. I have had some wonderful conversations with random people
40. I feel someone/something is watching out for me.
41. I can be practical. I can give practical advice to my close friends.
42. I will put myself out there, even when I’m afraid.
43. I am someone I can love.

:)

from elnoco3’s entry

self-reminder: whenever i feel self-conscious to take deep breath and switch focus from me and what others think of me, to what i am doing or saying, and how best to do/say it.

..(said with eyes rolling)

so in the middle of the work day, while my boss in on the fone. i turn left in one of those chairs with wheels at the bottom and somehow manage to fall. But the fall is very slow-mo like a graceful dancer, my hands go up and somehow entire chair falls down and i fall with it.. on my left, still not sure how this happened.

my boss was too busy in fone convo to really laugh, but we did make up for that after she hung up! :)

sigh- makes me look so professional and on top of things at work!

...right here...

stuck, I feel.

Its like the words are there in my mind, but I can’t speak them out. I always fear I’ll say or do the wrong thing. I know about learn from your mistakes, take a chance, business, but somehow..

..can’t seem to get myself out of the paralysis of indecision..

and i’m adding too much drama to it, which makes it worse.

got the idea of doing something about this from Timothy’s list on self-actualize

3) go ahead, and think, no matter what happens, it’ll be done with, and i can move on from there.

really really do… i wish i could write more.. but already again am self-conscious (haha!)

I think these might be of help

1) Humour
no problem is so big that you can’t run away from it! :) (i think that was in beethoven) but it illustrates the point of humour itself.

2) Repeating ‘I don’t care’.
A friend recommended this to me once, and I say this, sometimes, even loud out, but it always strikes me as a negative thing to say.

...so last night I went with friends, and i was self-conscious because i actually looked good, cos (it showed that) i had actually put the effort, and also because i sat next to a guy i liked once, and when he said something kidding-negative.. i just took it so seriously. i wish i could just ‘not care’ it away…