proactively stave off depression

I had the 3 o’ clock depression again yesterday even though I made sure I’d eaten enough. I dealt with it by running myself a bath with this delicious smelling bubble stuff I got from Rain, and reading a little book I’ve gotten myself on The Hobbit whilst nibbling on a Merci chocolate :) I did feel better, but I want to find a longer term solution. Time for some research…

seems to be essential for me whenever the blues are threatening. So I have been productive. Now what?

actually eating. The stress is killing my appetite, so I don’t even realise I need food. I had a snack with my normal pool expedition yesterday and I felt like a new person. Weird. You’d think I’d just get a rumbly tummy like most people. But I suppose I don’t feel like most people right now.

I seem to be fine until about three in the afternoon and then boom!, deep depression. I’m not sure why this would be. I am trying to deal with it by going out to the pool around that time. The sun and the water help.

- went for a walk
- achieved something (my proposal)
- had an afternoon nap (it remains to be seen whether this was a good idea or not)
- hung out by the pool drinking fresh orange juice
- am about to eat a creme caramel while watching an episode of the Mentalist (current favourite show)

I think part of how I feel might be related to feeling really bored now that varsity is over. A week or two holiday was great, but now I don’t know what to do with myself. I can find things, but…my heart’s not in it. I don’t think that is helping on top of all the stress. Stressed and bored hmmm, recipe for disaster. I must find a way to actually enjoy my vac.

I stretched, went out for a lovely breakfast, did a lot of walking, passed the buck when it was appropriate to do so and had really chocolatey ice cream for dessert >:>

I feel a little better, but only a little. I will probably have to keep working at this for a while.

and I don’t want to go down Depression Road. Especially not now when I really need to be there for myself. An ending relationship, moving house, a scary operation eliciting irrational fears of death, a major life-changing career choice that needs to be made and a very stressful project have been proving a bit much for me. But I have to find a way to make it stop being too much.

I have determined to find 5 things to do today to proactively stave off the depression that is creeping into my system.