...but each time I ended up looking at my last entry about wanting to buy him a ball that clocks his speed. Which makes me feel embarrassed and ashamed that I still do not have a job and still have not bought him any pitching equipment. Enough whining though… that won’t help at all.
So, I looked into balls that track velocity and they are actually relatively inexpensive—compared to what I was imagining anyway. I still would like to get him one because he keeps mentioning wanting to try one out… But I’m starting to think what he really needs is a radar gun that measures speed.
This goal has been on my mind lately because my boyfriend broke his pitching arm. He is being a wonderful sport about it, trying to see this experience as an opportunity to gain better control with his left arm and hand. Still, it’s not like he can work out or go toss pitches or anything until after his cast is off and he goes to physical therapy. Seeing him unable to use his arm reminds me of how transient our physical attributes are and how easily we can lose the power we once had in certain parts of our bodies. That may seem like an overdramatic reaction to a broken arm, but the point is that I feel my boyfriend should work on improving his game and seeing what he can make of himself while he is still young and has his current level of stamina and passion.
On one of our first dates, I asked my boyfriend what he thinks about before he falls asleep at night. He told me that, every night since he was a child, he has almost always been at pitching practice in his head or has imagined himself pitching a game before falling asleep. How could I not be moved to encourage him to pursue this dream after hearing that? In addition, my boyfriend has a mild form of a muscular disorder (which he has worked very hard to manage) and could serve as a wonderful inspiration to others if he made this dream a reality.
I know that, realistically speaking, he has more chance of alien undies falling from the sky and landing on his head than he does of making it into the major leagues, so that is not what I mean when I say “pitching professionally.” I know that just being paid to work as a pitching coach at a school somewhere would make him happy. Still, I don’t think he’ll ever be satisfied that he tried hard enough to see if this could happen for him if he doesn’t at least try out for the minors…
I think that, in life in general, he is seeking a way to test his limits, prove himself, and inspire others, while being involved with a sport he is passionate about… all while getting paid for it. I don’t know which is more important to him, or even which is more possible for him: finding a job (any job) for himself that fits that equation, or being able to prove his ability as a pitcher (even if it’s only ever just a hobby).
I didn’t know much of anything about baseball until we got together, so I don’t know how best to encourage him—nor do I know how realistic his idea of being paid in some way for his pitching expertise really is… Maybe I should just encourage his pitching as a hobby? I could hope to someday arrange a one-time opportunity for him that would give him a taste of this dream, like trying to score him an invite to throw the opening pitch at a game. (I get the impression that a LOT of baseball fans would like to do that sort of thing though…) Then again, being an actor myself and having career hopes that many perceive as far-fetched has taught me to never laugh off anyone else’s seemingly impossible dreams… so I wouldn’t want him to settle for just a taste of pitching if it’s really what he wants to pursue.
So far, given my ignorance of how else to support him, I’ve figured that the best thing I can do is to provide him with the kind of tools and equipment he’d be unlikely to get for himself. He is not the kind of person who buys things for himself easily (if at all).
So sorry for the length of this entry… Just felt the need to write this and am not expecting anyone to make it through all my ramblings.
