stop procrastinating

I am leaving for California trip next week, and I am so not prepared! Yet I am making lists and doing a little stuff at a time, and I know it will all fall into place!I am not so affraid. I think that the pace I am going is pretty good!

Today I bought a really cute shirt at the thrift store. I told myself when i bought it that I would sew it to make the kneckline better. Well, I came home and was waiting for my hubby to wake up from his nap so we could eat…instead of just sitting there doing nothing or watching Tv I actually sewed it! I am proud of myself. I even felt good about doing something productive with my time. I have a whole pile of clothes in my art studio waiting to be sewn. I need to get on that!

I think I am a bit OCD! I write lists of stuff every day. Sometimes I do the stuff on the list (if it is a “to -do” list) but other times I just write these random lists of ” things I want someone to say to me” or “100 things I deserve” “100 things I want to grieve for”.
I think I use them to procrastinate! Like…”oh…I am busy doing something productive…I am writing a list of stuff I want to do!” but most of the time I never pursue the stuff on the list. So I have actually started to feel guilty about the time I spend writing lists and journaling.
I started list writing seriously several years ago…as a form of “self-help” it was in a book about journaling. And I already wrote lists all the time at least one every day about something! I thought it would be good therapy.And alot of the time I feel like it does help me.
I told my counselor about my feelings about it, and she asked me if I liked doing it? If it made me happy? and I said yes. And she said that I need to stop feeling guilty about “wasting time” writing lists if I am enjoying it and if I feel like it helps me!
I really need to think about this more!