make a good transition into the next stage of my life

Well since my life seems to always be in somewhat of a period of transition, this goal would never actually be complete.

But, it’s complete in the sense that the major transition’s (namely two- mother and ex-boyfriend) that I have gone through in the past year have really changed my life, for the better.

I have done some real good soul searching, this time.

I have decided to not repeat past mistakes as I have done so often in the past.  I think, this time, that I have learned something valuable and I don't ever want to lose it.

I am moving forward with a big smile and a joyful hope for the future.

I am not only “back on track”, but have found a much better track than ever before.

Yea for me! For no, this goal is complete!

until the next major transition (haha!)

I think this goal is moving along nicely! I am working on me, ME! ME! And the funny thing is…. I like it! A LOT! I have no man, at this time- I want no man!

I am playing softball. I am decluttering my house. I am going to church, meeting people there, taking a couple of classes there, getting my (two youngest) involved like we all used to be

I am enrolled in college. Taking two of the last six classes before my (A.G.S.) degree.

I am learning what it is that I like to do and I am actually doing it and having FUN!!

Yea for me!!

There are “Three Rules of Life”..... If you’re a human being and breathing these rules apply to you.

Rule No.1: You live and die by your own choices. People and circumstances influence us. We can’t control that. But we do have control over our response to those people and circumstances.

Rule No. 2: You can choose smart or shoose stupid…. The smart list and stupid list have been predetermined for all of us by God’s Word.

Rule No. 3: There is always somebody or some circumstanmce whose job it is to make our life miserable when we choose stupid.

- He is the author of Losing Control & Liking It: How to Set Your Teen (and Yourself) Free.

I’m going to buy the book. It’s inexpensive. Thanks Gurl in the Curl!

I have learned some things. Keep it simple; declutter, finish uncompleted tasks. Journal and keep it about me and keep it positive kind of stuff.

But, this is the one that I ponder on and totally releives some stress on the whole “changing, growing, moving forward” kind of thing: progress NOT perfection. There are NO RULES on my journey AND I will NEVER get it perfect, it will NEVER be done, just keep moving forward.

Deside what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it, estabilish your priorities and go to work!

I have no idea how this is going.

I think I am in the mist of transition continually these days. I’m not even sure what goals I want to set for myself besides the same ones I keep working on…. my credit, going to the gym, trying to think about getting back into church, trying to get my homelife in order.

I am talking to the ex-boyfriend, probably not a good idea, probably a MAJOR back sliding!! I don’t know how I feel about this one, honestly.

Three of my kids are mad at me over it, one thinks it’s no one’s business and two are too young to even get it.

I have been feeling soooo depressed the last three weeks, of course the last couple of days have been MUCH better and today is the day (after waiting weeks for the appointment) that I have a counseling appt and I DON’T want to go now.

I hate taking time off work (well, love it, just can’t afford it), I hate wasting my time with a stranger who… sometimes they help and sometimes they don’t and I don’t feel the energy to keep trying to find the right person to talk too.

I am IMPATIENT!!!

AND THEN… in the midst of all this… you have people that are REALLY in a transition that maybe they just can’t control and my STUFF seems so very TRIVIAL!!!

Not to sure where to go from here. Tequila n beer for now….. Nice transition, huh???!

Well, now have my mother back where she was. Kinda difficult- weird decision. Not time yet to live with my mother.

It went better than I thought… the moving out of my mother thing! Whew!

This is the best thing for my life. No stressful boyfriend bringing me down on many different levels, now no mother… I am starting to feel…... FREE!!!! Just me and my kids. It has been four years since just me and my kids!!

Now I’m trying to f it up by talking to men. I think men say they are looking for long term and yada yada…, but then why is it always about sex?? Sex is GOOD, GREAT! Love it, not a problem…. if it’s long term why not focus on the “problem… umm.. things” That could potentially pop up. Kids… Passions.. Interests… REAL things… I’m justagirl! What do I know.

AnyHoo… Happy Days on the way…. If I don’t f them up one way or another!

The women’s group wasn’t what I needed. I felt bad being there. They were ALL meth addicts or recovering, all had been in jail or prison or getting ready to go in, all were on probaton or parole, all had lost their kids or were in the process of losing them.

A GREAT group of women, but made my stuff seem trivial!

Another bad mistake- getting rid of a bad boyfriend- good for me- having my mother move in- bad for me. It is stressful and hard!

So far NOT making a good transition into the next stage of my life. At least it doesn’t feel good.

I have been talking to men on the phone also. Have been on three dates- platonic, nice dates, with nice men- one REALLY NICE date that ended with a WONDERFUL kiss in the rain.

I want to take it slooow. I think he wants to move FAST. Have to stick by my guns. If we really really like each other then it will be…. if not then it won’t.

As BADLY as I want to do other things too- I just really need to be careful this time around not rush into something that is not meant to be and end up feeling…... badly.

I think- not sure yet, just think- that I feel better with no man, at least right now. I don’t like thinking about him all the time. I am distracted at work, I think of him in the night and lose a little sleep. Don’t like being preoccupied with thoughts of him…..