something happened 2 days ago and im not sure if i should accept it or pretend it never happened. or what to do. but it went against all my morals. it was the one thing if all else failed that i vowed not to do till i was married. but i let my guard down and everything around me collapsed. it seemed unimportant anymore. thats when i knew something was wrong. i know i made a mistake in not staying true to myself and my values. regretful? yes, but i dont know if pretending it never happened is a good thing. i just dont know how to accept it. i held such high expectations for myself and i failed. its not about anybody else, its about me. for once i need to focus on what makes me happy. i just dont know what to do anymore. maybe that’s why i’m writing this, because if i have it out there in the open i know what happened and i know what i can do to change things. i am not happy with what i did and cant help wondering what if, but the day i erase the what if from my mind, i’ll know i’m alright. maybe not normal , if there was ever a true definition of normal, but ok. in a way i’m glad it happened because it is helping me learn so much more about myself. but it’s too soon to know.
GracieGeo has written 1 entry about this goal
and move on
2 years ago
