be a better daughter

Six weeks ago my mom broke her ankle and needed major surgery. She’s been unable to do almost everything, because she can only hop on one foot holding onto her walker. So, my brother and I have been taking turns going to her apartment to make her meals, do laundry, wash her hair, etc. I see her a lot now, and we talk and laugh all the time. She never lets anything get her down, even the scare that if infection set in, they might have to amputate her foot. Her circulation is poor due to vasculitis, so the healing was iffy. But she’s ok now, and will start physiotherapy in 4 weeks time. I feel that I’ve been able to help her and be with her, and that we’ve become closer. I don’t mind at all…she’s been such a great mom all my life, and nothing but supportive, loving, encouraging and selfless. I feel I can remove this goal now from my list.

My mother and I went out for lunch and then did some Christmas shopping a few days ago. I called her that night to ask her something, and she told me that she’d had a lot of fun, and that she gets lonely, and she likes spending time with me. And she said, “I love you.” We do tell each other this, but what touched me was that she mentioned her loneliness, and I know she needs companionship. I want to make more time for her, and now that I’m not working, this is so easy.

My mom is lonely, in spite of me being in the city and seeing her about once a week and calling her too. She needs friends her own age…which is 75. I know there are so many lonely seniors out there, and it’s so sad. I went out for lunch with mom today, and had her over for brunch last Sunday. I need to find a club or group for her to join. It must be hard being a widow and not having many friends to keep you company.

I bought my mother an orchid. She’d cut out an article in the local newspaper about how to take care of them, but she didn’t have one. I had recently bought one, and she didn’t know it. So, I thought it would be something we could share…raising orchids. I bought her one, and a similar one like it for myself. Now I have two, so I can say “I’m raising orchids,” instead of “I’m raising an orchid.” She was thrilled and it made me so happy I almost cried.

Having her over for brunch tomorrow. I can tell she sounded happy on the phone when we talked about the details. :)

I signed my mom up for T’ai Chi and dancersize (senior’s classes) and she starts next week! Of course I asked if she’d be interested in any of these classes before actually signing her up, and she was very happy about it. Also went over for dinner with G, and had a wonderful time. Just socializing more with her is a treat. I made some potato leek soup I’m going to bring over…brought her some pumpkin pie last week. What a sweetie my mom is!

I think my mom gets lonely and I feel guilty because I’m not around enough to spend quality time with her. I asked her to see The Prairie Home Companion and she loved it!! It really is a charming movie. My mom is charming too. I love her to bits.

Of the 12 Coffee Crisps that G hid and I found, I have given some to my mother. I’m not telling how many. I’m very nice to do this for my mom. :) So, see my goal, “Eat less sugar” for the next Coffee Crisp installment.