love my job

I really wanted to like this job, but I just don’t know. There are days when it is okay, but most days are incredibly stressful for me. The environment I work in deals with life and death, which makes me feel anxious most of the time. Everyday is stressful, it is such an unprofessional atmosphere.

I keep telling myself to give it a full year. I’ve heard over and over again people telling me that it takes a new nurse at least a year to feel comfortable at work.

But truthfully I no longer know if nursing is for me.

Today was the sort of day that made me hate my job. I really felt like I could not do a single thing right today. And…I almost cried. I seriously had to bite my tongue and take deep breaths in order to fight back the tears. I want to be good at what I do, but maybe I just don’t have what it takes for this job…

After going out for drinks last week with a couple of girls from work, I had the idea that I should make it a priority to get to know the people I work with. The more they become “friends” rather than “co-workers”, the more it will become enjoyable to go to work.
So I think I will invite some people from work out for drinks again!

I have to admit that today I enjoyed work…For the most part, anyway. There were some moments that I still felt a little incompetent and frazzled, but I think I did okay.

1. It’s interesting
2. It’s challenging
3. I get to see the inside of bodies (which I find kinda cool)
4. I get to be part of a team that helps people
5. It will never be boring
6. I have the support of coworkers (for the most part)
7. The pay is reasonable
8. I can work overtime if I want (whether or not that is a good thing…)
9. I get the opportunity to develop specialized skills

I tried to think of a tenth reason, but this is all I could come up with. Really, this list is just sort of my way of convincing myself that I like my job. One could argue that if I don’t like my job, then I should quit. The problem is that I know that the reason I don’t like my job is because I feel incompetent and therefore anxious half of the time. So really, I will stick it out and hope it gets better as I learn more. In the meantime, I will try and remember why I chose this career, and the positive aspects of this job.

I wish I could wake up and look forward to going to work. I like my job, but I don’t love it.
In fact some days I hate it. It can be so stressful, and some of the people I work with can be pretty unsupportive of new people. I guess what I need to realize is that it is only a job, it is not my life. I need to keep that in mind in order to reduce my worrying and stress.