Reflection & Processing ~
Thank you to everyone who responded and supported my previous post. I really value your input, ideas, and mostly (of course) your sincere caring and friendship!
(S. you are right it’s about values & perceptions)
Here are a few things that popped out for me:
I am seeing the issue clearly, and I basically know the answer.
In this situation, I am holding the cards, although this person does have some ‘power/influence/input’ into other parts of my life.
So, I do not want to burn bridges or cut off my nose to spite my face.
Things have been off-balance, but I have given “freely” ~ my time is valuable, and I need to give it to people and projects that bring mutuality and goodness.
I can define, redefine, and set boundaries accordingly ~ I deserve to live in a way that I choose.
This is an issue of values ~ this person does not value friendship and caring in the same way that I do. This has been evidenced over the course of several years, where I have overlooked more than a few offenses, smoothed out situations for the betterment of this person and others, and basically stood by the person when many other people did not.
Is the friendship worth it? Great Question ~ I think there is no friendship really. That was my mistake, I wanted there to be friendship, but really…it is not. So, that is my bad! I think that is where the redefining comes in ~ very helpful.
I am redefining this relationship to strictly professional and business, and recognize that this is not a friendship. I will give to the mutual projects that we work on as far as is comfortable, equitable, and beneficial to me and/or those we are working with, but I decide what that looks like, and I am not afraid to express myself and use my voice in a positive and affirmative way.
When this relationship is over ~ I will end it well and with gratitude. It’s not time yet, but understand that this time will come, and I will be prepared.
Thank you friends ~ I saw a quote recently on the side bar:
“People are more influenced by how much you care than how much you know.”
I think this is very true, and my “business” colleague would do well if he understood this, but, I do not think this is something he will learn in this lifetime….
Namaste Friends ~
I believe in ending well….. :)